


Save a life to Save a Soul

by K___Kelly



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Aftermath of Torture, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Body Horror, Dehumanization, Eventual Jester/Caleb, Eventual Romance, Everyone swears, F/M, Gen, I love dnd but I'm about to fuck with the arcane mechanics, Implied/Referenced Torture, Major Original Character(s), Medical Experimentation, Mighty Nein as Family, Multi, Non-Consensual Body Modification, Onomancy/order of the scribe, Past Abuse, Psychological Torture, Scourgers (Critical Role), Team as Family, Torture, Trent Ikithon Being an Asshole, Variation on the scourger background, Warning: Trent Ikithon, no beta we die like men
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-28
Updated: 2021-02-04
Packaged: 2021-03-06 20:22:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 17
Words: 26,523
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26154907
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/K___Kelly/pseuds/K___Kelly
Summary: When the Mighty Nein find a crumpled almost lifeless body outside the candles they decide to take a former scourger under their wing and the consequences of this choice are swift and heavy. Caleb looks for his own redemption in the conclusion of this girl's story. Jester finds herself instinctually tapping into her motherly instincts. The Mighty Nein make their first cross-continent trip to find the origins of the Cerberus Assembly's residuum supply. And the tentative peace between Xhorhas and the Empire is unexpectedly threatened!
Relationships: Jester Lavorre/Caleb Widogast, Percival "Percy" Fredrickstein Von Musel Klossowski de Rolo III/Vex'ahlia, Scanlan Shorthalt/Pike Trickfoot, The Mighty Nein & Original Character(s), Vox Machina & Original Character(s)
Comments: 38
Kudos: 154





	1. Outside the Candles

**Author's Note:**

> Rating may change depending on how dark I decide to make this...
> 
> So uh hello! I swore up and down and left and right that I wouldn't write a Critical Role fic with an OC but um I still did? Sorry about that. OC fics used to be my thing back in the day but anywho I hope you enjoy and please be nice to my girl I love her way too much.

“Shh Jes you gotta keep it down! Caleb is this his tower the one at the edge?”

Caleb looks up at the tower glowing softly against the stark cloudless night sky. Memories threaten to come flooding back but a claw sinking into his shoulder and a soft mew refocuses him on the task at hand. His hand reaches up instinctually to scritch Frumpkin until the panic subsides fully.“Ja.”

“Just to be clear what exactly are we accomplishing here?”

Beau lifts her goggles high enough to make sure Fjord can see her glaring at him.

“I said SHHkk!”

He lowers his voice. “Sorry, sorry it’s just are we doing reconaissance are we trying to map the grounds what’s the plan exactly?”

Fjord almost jumps out of his skin when Yasha suddenly whispers beside him.

“I mean do we usually have a plan?”

As they continue their whispered discussion Jester breaks off from the group slightly to try and estimate how much blank space she could fill at the base of tower. She wanders a bit further away still trying to whisper her response. “Well technically you know we _had_ a plan we were going to try and map out the sewer tunnels beneath here but then we ran into those fuckin glyphs and shit so now we’re here. Hey Caleb how many dicks do you think will fit at the base of Ickythong’s…”

Jester’s question is cut off suddenly. She was halfway to the tower and completely engrossed by the thought of painting a rainbow with dick clouds at either end when she tripped over something in the darkness and Beau saw her go down. 

“Jes? JES are you okay?” Beau whisper yells.

Fjord and Caleb immediately turn toward the sound, Veth dashes toward Jester who for some reason hasn’t gotten back up.

“What happened?” Her scratchy voice jumps an octave in concern.

Caleb winces eyeing the tower nervously.

“I would strongly recommend that we try to move more quietly ja? We do not want to be caught trespassing on these grounds.”

“CAYLEB”

Jester’s shout sends Caleb into an immediate panic.

“Jester please!” He hisses as he makes his way over to her stumbling in the darkness. She scrambles to her feet and holds out an arm to stop him. Her voice drops to a full whisper.

“Cayleb don’t move I-I tripped over a person, it looks like a kid she’s all bloody and she isn’t moving.”

He immediately drops to his knees beside her taking off his coat and casting the dancing lights beneath it to dim the light source.In an instant a figure is illuminates.A young girl with short brown almost black hair, stained bandages wrapped around her arms and legs, fists balled and crusted with drying blood, both eyes screwed shut in fear or pain. Caleb’s keen eye catches a slight green glow leaking through the bandages near her wrist, but he blinks and it fades away.Jester follows his lead plopping down beside him and immediately reaches out with a healing spell. The girl stirs, moaning and both of her eyes flash open.

“It’s okay we’re here to help you also I can heal you way more, but first we need to get away from here.”

The girl closes her eyes again and turns away shuddering. Caleb immediately begins searching for a flat space to draw out a teleportation circle. A quick glance around reveals that there is no spot nearby that is compatible with the spell’s needs.

“Scheisse.”

He looks over and sees that Jester has tried to ease the girl’s obvious discomfort by pillowing her head in her lap and pouring as much short term healing into her as she can.Her breathing is still labored and shallow. Meanwhile the rest of the Nein have clustered around he flinches when Beau puts a hand on his shoulder.

“If we’re taking her we need to go.”

He nods. “We are.”

“I figured as much still thought I’d ask since we don’t really understand what we’re picking up here and this…this might be a trap.”

She looks down and the girl lying in Jester’s lap is curled into herself and trembling. Beau looks away from the sight. “A really sick trap… But fuck it right? Now how are we getting out of here?”

He shakes his head still staring at Jester holding the girl. “We cannot leave her.”

“We’re not going to leave her.” Jester looks down at the girl still clinging to her fearfully. “We’re not going to leave you here we promise, Cayleb will get us all out of here. Right Cayleb?”

Caleb frowns looking around at the rest of the group. He watches as Caduceus kneels down next to Jester working to continue to try and stabilize the girl in spite of their magical limitations. Veth is staring at the girl and then at Caleb and then at her again. Even Fjord is looking at Caleb expectantly and he silently wonders when this became his decision? His _responsibility_. Calculations start running through his mind at breakneck speed, but before he can determine the best possible solution, howls cut through the silent night and fear rises like bile in his throat. The sound spurs him to a decision. 

“Jester, Caduceus are your sanctuaries prepared?”

They both nod wordlessly. Caleb shudders as the howling gets louder and running feet get closer. He grabs onto Jester who immediately reaches out to touch Yasha and Beau. She mutters quickly under her breath and instantly they’re surrounded and engulfed by a green glow. The sounds of vicious pursuit fade away as they open their eyes to see the soft magical lighting of the Xhorhaus’ rooftop err treetop? Jester starts looking around frantically but breathes easy when she sees Caduceus arrive in his sanctioned place with Fjord and Veth in tow. Her relief is cut off by the pained moan coming from the girl still curled in her lap.

“Oh shit, uh it’s okay we’re safe now. Umm are you okay? I think Caduceus still has some healing left but not much more until morning sorry.”

The girl is still shaking but she turns her head enough to get a good look at the people holding and surrounding her.The warm light illuminates seven figures most not human, but all wearing some mixed expression of kindness, concern, and suspicion. A tall human man approaches and sits next to the tiefling woman who is still cradling her gently. He leans down and looks the girl in the eye.

“We are the Mighty Nein we are a group of assholes who sometimes do good things by chance. You ah you do not look too well mein freund.”

She sits up almost immediately, wincing at the sudden movement but returning the immediate intensity of his gaze. A bandaged hand travels up to her throat and she shakes her head.Her jaw is clenched and two large brown almost black eyes are rapidly filling with tears.

Jester catches on quickly and moves to give her some breathing room whispering to Caleb. “I don’t think she can talk.”

He nods watching as she tries to pull herself onto her feet. Yasha reaches out to steady her, she flinches at the contact but uses the opportunity to stumble into a standing position.Her eyes dart around still fearful and pained.Caduceus sighs deeply somewhat internally conflicted before deciding to cast Calm Emotions. The adrenaline coursing through her instantly dries up and she all but collapses onto Caduceus. “There now, sorry about that but I think you need some rest, we have a spare room you can recover in and when you’re ready I’ll bring you some nice tea…”

Only Jester sees the expression of guilt and anger flicker across Caleb’s face before he stands and says.“S-She should stay with one of us she shouldn’t be left alone. She could stay…”

Beau cuts in still eyeing the girl suspiciously. “I second that, after all we don’t know _what_ we just picked up it’s better if we keep an eye on her.”

Caduceus nods his agreement and begins making his way down the winding stair of the Xhorhaus with everyone following in dazed state. No one had expected the evening to go this way.

Jester pipes up. “Ooh you know what Beau she should stay in my room you know since our rooms are connected and then whoever is taking care of her can use your room to keep an eye on things but also you know like give her some space.”

Fjord nods solemnly still clearly shaken by the whole occurence. “We should take shifts, I-I’ll go first I won’t be falling asleep anytime soon after this.”

Jester looks down at her bloody skirt and then over at the unconscious girl in Caduceus’ arms. “Me neither, I’ll go after Fjord.”

Beau sighs, deliberately still looking away. “I’ll watch with Fjord.”

Veth who up until now has been quiet whispers to anyone who is listening. “What do you think happened to her?”’

Caleb stops suddenly and Yasha bumps into him.

“Sorry.”

Caleb tries to respond to either of them but the words keep getting lodged in his throat and his head is suddenly too light and the section of floor he started staring at is beginning to blur around the edges. The question settles heavily on the group, but no one answers. Jester opens the door to her room and Veth immediately starts fussing with blankets and sheets and lighting.

“I’ll watch with Jessie.”

She's purposefully keeping her hands busy but she can’t keep her eyes from darting over to the still sleeping figure now bundled carefully onto the bed. Caduceus is preparing a bowl of sweet herbs. The smell is soothing it clears her mind, but she doesn’t want to think clearly right now.

Yasha hasn’t entered the room yet.The herb smell finds her in the hallway and brings back memories of restless nights when Caduceus had tried to help her. For weeks after she returned her dreams had been haunted by Obann. One night Caduceus had found her pacing restlessly around midnight and without any explanation he prepared the herbs and left them in her room to use if she wanted.A week of dreamless sleep had been exactly what she needed to drain away the bone deep exhaustion.Her thoughts now flit toward Caleb as she notes his unusual silence and suddenly realizes that he is standing directly behind her barely peeking into the room. His brow is furrowed with pain? Confusion? She’s not sure exactly but she can definitely tell that something is wrong.

“Ah I think I should take my watch with C-…”

“Caduceus.”

She turns startled as Caleb abruptly cuts her off. “You should watch with Caduceus I need to transcribe a spell, I will make for poor company on watch tonight.”

Supressing her intial surprise she nods in agreement respecting his desire for time alone.He moves past her and she struggles to read his expression even as he gently tugs Veth away from the bedside.“You should rest liebling before your watch.” He looks up at Jester repeating the sentiment silently. Still careful not to allow too much affection to seep through his gaze.

“Well that all seems settled I think we should save all other decisions until after we get some sleep.” Caduceus’ suggestion is agreed to and they slowly trickle out leaving Fjord and Beau to take the first shift.


	2. Night Shifts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let's go full speed ahead! Enjoy!

“Soooo how have you been?”

“Fjord are you…are you trying to make small talk right now? What the fuck man? I mean how long have we been travelling together now?”

“I know I know I just…what the fuck are we even supposed to talk about?! I mean can we at least both agree that _this_ is weird.” He gestures toward the sleeping girl who is still sprawled under the covers nearby. “I don’t want to just stare at her the whole time do we maybe have cards or something? I mean are we supposed to change out her bandages? I’m really at a loss here.”

Beau groans glancing at the girl, her face is lax finally free of the pained expression almost peaceful. “You stay here I’ll go find some cards or something.”

Two hours later Jester stumbles into her room still half asleep, Veth is armed with even more blankets and pillows as well as a soft towel and a bowl of warm water.Beau eyes her pile and Veth shrugs. “You know me I like to keep my hands busy.”

Beau immediately recognizes that Veth’s motherly instincts have come out swinging, but she can’t resist teasing her just a little. “Then start knitting or something don’t just keep bringing more crap into my room.”

Veth flips her the bird and without breaking eye contact proceeds to spread the blankets and pillows all over Beau’s floor.

Beau chuckles and yawns.“Fuck you too.” She then turns to Jester who is still rubbing the sleep out of your eyes. “Hey Jes you might want to grab your sketchbook or something everything has been pretty quiet.I had enough time to beat Fjord at hearts _twice_. 

“Couldn’t even give me a chance to learn the rules.” Fjord mutters under his breath.

Jester yawns,”Mmkay sounds good, also Fjord I’m sorry that Beau is such a bad sport next time I’ll teach you how to win at hearts I’m super good.”

“Thank you Jester.”

“Hey I’m not a bad sport you just suck.”

“ALRIGHT that’s enough”. Veth wastes no time shooing them both out leaving her and Jester in relative peace.

“Ooh I think I’m gonna paint something on my walls.”

“Mmm” Veth responds non-comittally she has already seated herself on the edge of the bed with the warm cloth in hand hovering nearby. She is bracing herself for an unpleasant reaction even to a practiced touch.

“Oh I know! I’ll practice for exactly what I’m gonna paint the next time we’re at Ickykthong’s stupid tower.”

Ever so carefully the soft fabric begins to gently wipes away bits of dirt and grime on the girl’s face. She frowns momentarily but doesn’t wake. It takes a few seconds for Jester’s words to register. “Well hopefully the next time we see that tower is the last time, that place gave me the creeps it was almost worse than the sanatorium.”

“Yeah, I hope so too. Caleb seemed super upset and even more so after we found her but like a different kind of upset not like an angry or scared upset almost like a guilty upset. You know? 

“Mmm”.Veth now starts to gently rub away the blood that dried under her nails and was left caked between her fingers.She considers removing the bandages but thinks better of it. “Jester do you have some extra clothes for her when she wakes up?”

Jester looks up from her sketchbook toward her closet. “I mean I have lots of clothes so I’m sure I can find something nice that will fit her. Even though she is pretty skinny.”

Veth nods her approval but doesn’t say anything. She finds herself having to blink every few seconds to stop the image of Luc from filling her vision.If she’s not careful the memory of her family starving and overrun by goblinkin threatens to replace the reality of the skinny human girl; visually a wreck but currently sound asleep. For a split second a smile flits over her lips but it’s quickly chased away by a frown.

“Vethy are you okay? You look sad too?”

She blinks away tears and sets the bowl aside hopping down from the bed to join Jester on the floor.“I just…I miss my son.”

“Don’t worry. I’m sure we’ll go see Yeza and Luc real soon, I miss my momma too. Maybe we can ask Caleb to take us next week just for a quick trip?”

“Mmm”. She can’t bring herself to fully agree. Quick trips are almost somehow harder than the long ones. At this point she knows how she feels, but she still isn’t quite sure what she wants.

The time goes by faster than expected, Jester spends most of it happily accepting Veth’s artistic criticism and by the end of the watch they’ve settled on the perfect design for the base of Ickythong’s tower. 

“Uh hello, Jester, Veth?” Yasha ducks into the room followed closely by Caduceus.

“Oh hi Yasha, hi Caduceus she still hasn’t woke up and its been pretty boring so you know just like try not to fall asleep or anything although you probably could and nothing would happen its just that Caleb and Beau were being so weird but I guess its because they’re both from the Empire and they suuuper don’t trust the Assembly like at all but like I don’t even know how this kid could be part of the Assembly even though we found her near the assembly towers but I mean she’s like maybe a teenager? And I’m pretty sure they don’t let _teens_ be in the Assembly.”

Yasha is a bit taken aback by the stream of chatter which is characteristic of Jester but a bit overwhelming this late at night. “Well, I don’t know anything about the Assembly but I think Caleb was a kid or uh a teenager when he trained with Ikithon?”

Caduceus nods sagely, “Yeah I think he has mentioned that before.”

Jester’s eyes double in size and her mouth falls open even as her voice drops to a hissing whisper. “Ohh do you think she’s one of Ikithon’s students?”

“I mean it’s possible right?”

“Oh boy he’s gonna be like super pissed at us for stealing one of his students. Do you…” Jester stiffens as a horrible thought occurs to her. “Do you guys think he’s the one that made her all bloody and sick looking? I-Is this what he did to Caleb and his friends when they were kids?!”

Caduceus steps in to stem her growing concern. “Why don’t we slow down and wait until we talk to her before we start drawing any conclusions? The important thing is that she’s safe and we’re all safe and we have plenty of time to sort through all this.Now you two go get some rest and let us take over for you.”

Jester nods and follows Veth out of the room, she still looks worried but sleep is rapidly overtaking any new and horrifying theories that she had started conjuring up.

Caduceus settles down with a hot kettle of tea and two cups. “Would you like some?”

Yasha takes a deep breath inhaling the soft scent of the floral tea mixing with the sweet familiar herbs. “Yes please.”Caduceus carefully pours two cups of tea and as they sip their watch passes in relatively peaceful silence.

And because they are in Rosohna the sky doesn’t change for the final watch. Usually at this time Caleb would expect to see the night sky slowly begin to lighten before the pinks and purples of early morning break through the horizon. He wasn’t lying before when he said he needed to work on transcribing a spell. But he would be lying now if he tried to claim that the spell in front of him is ocupying any amount of his focus. Instead his eyes keep straying from the parchment toward the bed. He can see that she’s no longer sprawled out, now she’s curled into a tight ball and her brow is furrowed even in sleep. His keen senses detect that the sweet herbs have stopped smouldering and he watches with growing concern as she begins twitching and tossing under the covers. He starts to hear quiet mews of pain reminiscent of his familar but coming from the sleeping figure. Caleb begins inwardly debating with himself whether or not he should try to wake her? He watches as the decision is made for him. The girl bolts upright panting and hugging herself, eyes wild, every limb bound with tension.

“I-It is alright you are safe you are alright.”

She turns toward the voice but her human eyes are unable to pierce through the dim light. Her response is a guttural moan, more animal than human. Caleb sends his dancing lights up so they can see each other properly.She is staring at him. Some of the fear has receded but there is still an unmistakable vacancy in her eyes. 

He _knows_ that gaze he’s seen it reflected back at him hundreds of times in bathwater and errant puddles. That soulless stare devoid of life and hope.It still haunts him but it also makes him want to be the one to bring her back. To the present, to this room, to this morning, back from whatever nightmare she’s been trapped in. He approaches slowly hands at his sides; unthreatening. 

“My name is Caleb Widogast, what is yours?” She looks at him, but its almost like she’s looking past him. Her hand comes up to touch her throat again.

“Are you able to speak?”

She shakes her head.

“Is your throat in pain or…or were you born unable to speak?”

Her face twitches and she stares down at the coverlet shivering a little before she finally lifts her head and opens her mouth. The soft golden glow of the dancing lights reveals the gaping space where her tongue should be and the remainding mound of flesh that marks where the muscle had clearly been torn out and healed over.


	3. Wariness

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're keeping on let's see how long I can keep this ball rolling!

The sight of the mutilation startles him and a silent fury burns in his chest. Her face is flush with what might be embarassment? She quickly closes her mouth and moves to the edge of the bed as if to get up.

“Wait.”

She stops moving, her eyes rove around the room taking in every detail searching for additional threats.Caleb slowly reaches out to offer her a scrap of parchment and a pencil.

“Can you write?”

She nods taking the paper and pencil cautiously.

 _My name is Lexia_

“Lexia, h-how are you feeling a-are you alright? I ah assume you wanted to leave that place but we did not have time to ask you properly.”

_I wanted to leave. Thank you._

_“_ Ah yes of course. Your uh if you would like I believe one of our group might be able to help with your…” He trails off gesturing to his own mouth. A spark flickers in her eyes she bites her lip but hesitates to write out a response.

“It is your choice completely but I think we would like to help you if we can Lexia.”

She starts to stand up but scrambles back when someone knocks on the door softly.

A bright voice tries to whisper through the door. “Cayyyleb are you still awake? Is she awake yet? Do you want breakfast? Oooh if she’s awake ask her if she’s hungry Or actually can I just come in? I have some things I need to ask youuuu.”

Caleb glances over to see that the girl, Lexia has started climbing back under the covers.He approaches her slowly, nodding toward the door, “That is uh Jester at the door. She is the one who healed you last night I am going to let her in here she is a good…she is the best kind of person.”

No response. Lexia turns toward the wall and curls up under the covers. The door bursts open without warning.

“Cayleb are you okay? You didn’t answer meee?”

“Ah Jester I am sorry she is still not feeling well I did not want to disturb her too much.”

“Oh no! I’m sorry is she still sleeping? Do you think she needs more healing and stuff?”

“That is certainly a possibility.”

“Well then should we wake her up orrr?”

“I think she will wake up when she is ready.”

“Okay! Then I’ll go get us some breakfast and then we can talk cause Cayleb…” She reaches out to catch his hand, a sad smile plays over her lips. “We really need to talk.”

He nods in agreement as she skips off to find breakfast. Caleb readily anticipates that Jester’s idea of breakfast will most likely consist of donuts and other pastries. 

One by one each of the Mighty Nein wake up and walk past the room. Most remember to whisper but some are less considerate than others.No matter the noise level or discussion matter the small figure on the bed stays completely still. They all end up eating breakfast half in the room, half in the hallway, but not even the smell of pastries and fresh fruit causes the girl to stir.

Throughout the meal Jester tries to hide her disappointment. She had been planning on having breakfast with just Caleb so she could ask what he knew about the girl because she has a tiny sneaking suspicion that he knows or at least can guess what happened to the mystery girl. But still, it’s nice to be with everyone; whispering and giggling and playfighting in a wonderfully familiar way that she’s almost started to take for granted.After she finishes eating the majority of the blueberry donuts Jester stands up brushing the crumbs off her skirt before making her way over to the bed to inspect the sleeping girl.

“You know she still looks pretty badly banged up. I better do some more healing and then maybe she’ll feel better and she’ll wake up and we can find out who she is and where she’s from and everything.”

Jester starts to extends her hands to cast Cure Wounds but before she can touch the sleeping form, the covers flip up and the girl rolls off the bed and stumbles past her. But she misjudges her escape and slams directly into Beau.

“Hey what are you doing?!”

Beau reacts instinctively grappling the girl who immediately begins to try to twist and struggle out of her grasp. Everyone else automatically assumes a position of readiness except Caleb who steps in to try and defuse the situation.

“Beauregard let her go.”

“What? No! We don’t even know what her deal is!”

“She is harmless.”

“How the fuck do you know that?”

“She is a child!”

“So were you! OW!”

Beau adjusts her grip and glares down at the girl who just bit into her arm.Jester jumps between Beau and Caleb and at the same time Caduceus ducks into the room.

“Hey Beaauuu remember Toya?”

“Oh c’mon that’s not fair that kid was trying to help the demon toad kill us! And this one just bit me!”

Caduceus soothing voice breaks in to try and head off the beginning of a heated argument. “Now I think everyone just needs to calm down. None of us know exactly what’s going on here so we really shouldn’t be making assumptions.” The statement seems pointed at both Beau and Caleb.

Fjord cuts in. “Plus, there’s seven of us all in one room and we’re all pretty capable so I don’t think there’s really any need to restrain her even if she is dangerous which we do not know…yet…so maybe we can all chill out, agreed?”

Beau continues to glare but she reluctantly releases the girl who immediately backs away, hands behind her back and eyes lowered.Caleb steps in front of her.

“Please give her a chance to explain.” While saying this he attempts to hand the paper and pencil back to Lexia but she doesn’t take it. Caleb sighs and turns to face the rest of the Nein.

“Her name is Lexia and she is unable to speak because…”

He feels a small hand tug on his coat and he makes a split second decision to let her tell her story in her own time.

“…Because she has been hurt and _we_ pulled her away from the things and the people who were hurting her and I promised that we would help her in whatever way we can.”

Beau seems like she’s going to respond immediately and seems especially incensed by the implication that Caleb made a promise on behalf of the group without consulting the group. But Beau knows him well enough to realize that there is definitely more behind his promise than an emotional split second decision. She takes a deep breath before attempting to sort things out with some tact. “Look, I get that she’s caught up in pieces of your past and shit but that just gives us more reasons to be on our guard.”

Jester puts a hand on Beau’s shoulder. “But Beau look at her. She’s scared and Caleb’s right we can help her and we should!”

“That’s not the point Jes.”

Caleb feels the paper and pencil being snatched out of his hand he glances down at a scribbled message.

_I can leave._

He shakes his head and whipers. “Nein bitte ah I mean…” Before he can translate she writes out a response.

_But I won’t run if you don’t hurt me._

He cocks his head slightly and asks in Zemnian, “Can you understand me?”

_I can’t speak but I can still be useful I can understand Zemnian, Elvish, and Draconic. Please let me help you I’ll do anything._

She flips the parchment and continues writing.

 _Just please don’t send me back to that tower_

In Zemnian he responds, “We will never send you back there.”

Catching bits of the one-sided conversation Beau whispers to Veth, “Is he speaking Zemnian to her?” Veth nods absentmidedly trying to make sense of the whole bizarre scenario. Fjord step forward clearing his throat loudly. “So before we started bickering you were saying you had an explanation?”

Caleb looks down at the filled parchment and decides to hand her another piece. She takes it; nodding an answer to his silent question.

“If it is agreeable Lexia will answer questions on paper this way, but remember she is still hurting she needs more rest and more healing and…”

Beau interrupts directing the first question in a stern tone. “So where exactly are you from?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for the awesome responses I'm so happy people are enjoying it!


	4. Questions Asked and Answered

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Haven't lost momentum yet! Sooo enjoy!

She delays answering the first question.

_My name is Lexia_

There is a certain satisfaction in seeing her name written out again, but the feeling quickly fades. She grips the pencil a little tighter to write out her next answer even as the woman named Beauregard repeats her question.

“Where are you from?”

_I am from Nogvurot_

The half orc with the scar across his eye asks the next question. “What were you doing at the Candles?”

_I was made to be a student of the Soltryce Academy and I was taken aside by Trent Ikithon_

The blue tiefling jumps in with a question. Well more like a series of questions.

“Were you working for Ickythong or was he still teaching you? How old are you?

Lexia sits back down at the edge of the bed before answering.

_He took responsibility for me after I was expelled from the Academy_

She avoids the last question and Jester kindly doesn’t push the issue. For a while the questions keep coming and she answers them sufficiently but without offering many details.

“Are you still a student at the Academy?”

_I was expelled for excessive violation of arcane usage and extreme unprovoked violence_

“Unprovoked violence?”

_That is what they called it_

_It was not unprovoked and I would do it again_

“Even knowing you’d end up like this?” 

The question comes from Beauregard, its meant to throw her off but she writes her responsewithout any hesitation. 

_Absolutely_

At this point there’s a lull in the rapid fire questionaire and the moment of silence surrounded by strangers reminds Lexia that she still doesn’t know what everyone else’s names are and the not knowing makes her uneasy. But she doesn’t have a right to know. She owes them not the other way around. The next question from Jester is harder to answer.“What did he teach you?”

She chooses her words carefully.

_He made me into a weapon, but not a soldier_

_He said I was one of his volstrucker_

_But I was squeamish_

_Seeing other people bleeding made me sick_

_So I found other ways to be useful_

The halfling woman pipes up and zeroes in on a strange but deliberate detail. “Seeing other people’s blood makes you sick?”

_I’ve gotten used to seeing my own blood_

Her answer is straightforward, clinical, and no one really wants her to elaborate. At least not right now.

Beau circles back still uncovinced by her vaguely crafted answers. “I don’t think you really answered Jester’s question. What were you trained for exactly? What are your skillsets? I need you to give us a better idea of what we’re dealing with here.”

She complies succinctly.

_I learned to manipulate people_

_To gain information tactfully_

_To mold memories_

_Detect thoughts_

_And root out traitors_

Beau nods and seems satisfied at least for the moment.The tall wild looking woman continues to watch silently without asking any questions. But the much taller person with doe eyes and pink hair gently poses a much more difficult question in a low rumbling voice.

“Do you know what happened to you?”

She thinks carefully before answering.

_I crossed too many lines_

_He used me to experiment with artificial magical enhancements_

_So I escaped and you found me_

“And I’m very glad we did.” He speaks with so much kindness and sincerity but she can’t quite bring herself to believe him.

Jester breaks the settling silence. “So now that we know more about you we should tell you about us. Hi, I’m Jester I’m from Nicodranas which is the coolest place on the Menagerie coast my momma is the Ruby of the Sea…”

The words all meld together her mind only clings to the name, she files it away for safe keeping. The stern woman who has been called both Beau and Beauregard finally introduces herself properly.

“Beauregard Lionette, Expositor of the Cobalt Soul.”

“Veth Brenatto”

“Fjord"

“Caduceus Clay”

“Yasha”

One by one they give their names but any additional information aside from the names instantly slips through the cracks of her mind. The names are all that matter. With the names in hand the ground feels a bit more even.And now she’s a little more sure that she can stay here convince them that she is useful. Jester Lavorre interrupts these fleeting thoughts with an entirely different kind of question.

“Sooo can I heal you now?” She wiggles her fingers as her magic starts sparking in anticipation.

Lexia nods but stays completely still. She instinctually braces herself holding her breath even as the magic washes over her delicately, leaving behind the scent of cinnamon and vanilla. With that single gesture the searing pain in her arms finally fades and her breathing eases fully. The immediate relief is unexpected but not unwanted.

_Thank you_

She still feels sore and shaky, but she feels better than she’s felt in weeks maybe months.

“Do you have any questions for us?” The final question comes from Caleb he’s sitting near the foot of the bed giving her space but trying to remain close by as a reassuring presence.

She writes out a single question hiding at least a hundred implications.

_Will you let me be useful?_

Caleb hardly knows how to answer her. Just looking at her makes it clear that she doesn’t need to be useful right now what she clearly needs is time to recover.And the near skeletal frame of her body is evidence that she needs more healing than magic can immediately offer.But she looks up at him and that flash of a glance is packed with so much desperation he’s not sure how he can refuse her.He swivels helplessly towards Jester who is reading the message and chewing on her lip equally unsure of how to respond..She opens her mouth to respond but Caduceus steps in before she can.

“Lexia if you’re feeling up for it why don’t you come help me start preparing dinner? I was thinking of making a nice light vegetable stew and if we want to get all the flavors done properly we really have to start this sort of thing early in the day.”

Confusion ripples briefly across her face but she nods, struggles to her feet and stands up ready to find the kitchen and start working immediately. She leans on the wall to support her unsteady steps making her way determinedly to the door.Caduceus cautiously follows Lexia hoping to steady her if need be. She stumbles but catches herself, Fjord opens the door she can still feel all of their eyes on her. The intensity makes her wonder absentmindedly if they’re seeing a kid or just a thing broken beyond repair.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for sticking around so far hope you're enjoying yourselves!


	5. Vegetable Stew

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just one or two more chapters to transition and establish everyone THEN things are really gonna start picking up!

In the kitchen Caduceus puts Lexia to work chopping herbs and vegetables. Even though her hands are shaky she makes sure her work is precise. He takes this opportunity in the busy silence to offer some tea. No words need to be exchanged. She takes the handleless cup and sips the tea which is unexpectedly bitter? Up until now flavor had ceased to exist so she drinks it eagerly. The taste isn’t necessarily pleasant but its _there_ and that in itself is an unexpected gift. Caduceus chuckles softly watching her inhale the tea with something like enthusiasm. 

“It’s strong stuff but it should help your stomach get ready to handle some food. You don’t look like you’ve eaten much lately.”

She can’t answer since she doesn’t have words or paper on hand, but its less of a question and more of statement of fact. Caduceus doesn’t need her response to know that he’s right.He lets them easily fall back into comfortable silence. As she continues to chop carrots and onions into perfect tiny cubes her mind begins to drift through vague memories. Suddenly, her small scarred fingers peeking out of bandages are replaced by thin, pale, graceful hands. Calloused with care but inherently gentle. Caduceus is startled when he hears the knife clatter to the ground.

“Lexia is everything alright?

He puts a hand on her shoulder but she doesn't react. Her head is tilted upward and her eyes are fixed on some invisible figure. She recognized those hands and she looked up hoping to see a familiar face, but instead nothingness. The shape of the person is painfully familiar but the face is a blurry void impossible to identify. Impossible to _remember_.

 **_You will not remember_ ** ****

When the frantic fixation gives way to vacancy Caduceus wonders if he should continue trying to talk to her or move her into another room or…

Her attempt to make sense of the blurred features brings on blinding pain. She crumples inward holding her head and releasing the grip she had on a memory that she knows belongs to her somehow.

He sees her drop down holding her head crying. It starts soft but it rises until it becomes a sobbing scream.

“Lexia you’re safe it’s alright just breathe, in and out, come on now nice and easy. Just try to breathe with me.” She gasps in air but her attempt to inhale is cut off by a quieter moan.

The sounds bring the rest of the Nein running. Beau and Veth skid into the kitchen just as Caduceus offers a word of healing. Almost immediately the pain starts to the die down. He notices a change in her physicality and casts a much more powerful healing spell. Fjord and Yasha arrive seconds after Beau and Veth. By the time Caleb bursts into the kitchen and the healing has set in her crying stops abruptly. He hears Lexia sigh deeply as she opens her eyes and watches as she immediately tries to get back on her feet to continue working on dinner. She wobbles standing up, stumbles and this time she falls, but Jester dashes forward to catch her.

“Hey Lexy I think we might be done cooking for right now mmkay?”

Jester scoops her up effortlessly and carries her back to the bedroom. She doesn’t try to protest or resist.Whatever happened seems to have exhausted her short supply of strength and she is more than content to collapse back into the safety of a warm, fluffy bed. Lexia distantly notes the feeling of hands tucking blankets snugly around her and cool fingers resting on her cheek. Once again leaving behind the scents of sugar and spice so delightfully pungent she can practically taste them. Mmm. If she’d stayed awake a few seconds longer she might have felt the slight tingle of magic blooming in the back of her throat.

Jester closes the bedroom door softly behind her and turns around to see everyone clustered in the hallway. Fjord looks up at her.

“Well now that _that_ is temporarily resolved I think we need to have a group meeting.

“I think we should go to the warroom” Veth has a mischievous gleam in her eye.

“Uh which room is that again? Have we even used that room? Fjord notices the look and it usually spells disaster. Somewhere on the scale from “detective work” to fluffer nutter.

Jester ushers the group into the warroom which has recently been outfitted with a variety of weaponry including a shiny firearm that Veth is eyeing hungrily. Well that explains the room choice.

Beau jumps right into discussion.

“So, what are we going to do?”

“I mean we have to help her right? She needs us!” Jester looks like she might start crying depending on everyone else’s response.

“How? How are we supposed to help her exactly? She’s a kid and we are the most unstable danger prone group of assholes. We almost got Kiri killed like what, a hundred times? If she wasn’t safe before than she definitely isn’t safe with us.”

Caleb speaks up. “That is not necessarily how she sees it.”

“You saw what she wrote about being squeamish she won’t last ten seconds following us around.”

“There is more to her story and…and I cannot speak for her but I think she would be considerably safer with us than she was previously.”

That seems vague enought but Beau and Fjord can read between the lines well enough. “Alright but that still doesn’t answer the question what now?”

“I mean it seems pretty obvious”. They all turn to look at Veth who has snatched the weapon and is now sizing up the shotgun lovingly. “We get her back on her feet, heal her, feed her, whatever she needs, and then we find someplace where she will be safe. Maybe in Nicodranas isn’t she a mage of some sort? Maybe Yussa would be interested in having an apprentice or assistant? Unless of course she has some family she needs to find. Just a thought. By the way who added this beauty to the collection?” She asks referring to the shotgun.

“Dairon dropped it off last week said something about dangerous peacetimes and that she found a stash of them at the border she wanted me to check it out see if I could figure out where it came from, who made it, you know that sort of stuff.”

Beau narrows her eyes at the weapon. She hated it on sight. She has seen and felt the impact of Veth’s gun. More of them can only mean trouble.

“Can we focus on the issue here?”

“She’s not an _issue_ Fjord she’s a person!”

“I know you know that’s not what I meant I’d just like to come to some sort of agreement before she wakes up again or something else inevitably goes wrong.” Jester frowns but nods understandingly letting Fjord continue. “I think Veth had a good idea that seems like the best thing we can do for her. What do you think Caleb?” No one has failed to notice the specific effect this girl’s presence has had on Caleb’s demeanor.

He nods as well. “It does seem like a good plan we just have to make sure wherever we send her the Assembly cannot find her.” _Ikithon cannot find her_

Jester wrinkles her nose, “Also we have to ask if she even wants to Nicodranas or anywhere else maybe she wants to go back to Nogvurot or somewhere else.”

This prompts Yasha to raise her voice to its usual gentle lilt. “That is very important.”

“Yeah, we’re not going to be dicks about it the goal is to make sure she’s happy, safe and doesn’t try to kill us in our sleep.” The last statement has a tone of levity but Beau’s serious expression still indicates that the possibility hasn’t been fully dismissed.

“Ja that is the goal.”

“Good then that’s settled.” Fjord looks eager to resolve the whole scenario but Caduceus interrupts.

“Well I do agree its a good plan”. He smiles at Veth who has already taken apart and put the gun back together twice. “But I think we should be aware that its going to take a considerable amount of time to provide the sort of healing that she needs. Bodily and mentally. Even after she is more stable and well fed she won’t necessarily be ready or willing to be dropped off with another set of strangers no matter how kind they are. I’m sure this is all very disorienting for her.”

Beau glares, “Well then what are we supposed to?”

“All I’m saying is if we all agree to help her we need to stick with it or else we should start looking for some experts.”

Caleb is staring off distantly but they all hear his voice in cut in coldly. “No experts.”

The group memory of their trip to the Sanatorium insures that there is no response.

“Now is it settled?”

Beau looks at Jester whose eyes are still damp and Caleb whose vision has turn completely inward. She sighs and stretches.

“Yeah we’ll help her and then we’re all going to need therapy.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you think? Hope you enjoyed it! Also I welcome all theorizing in the comments I love hearing people's guesses on what's happening or might happen next...


	6. Restoration

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the slight delay I was doing battle with the muses

The first week with Lexia is not easy. Some days are better than others. Occasionally there are good moments, a shimmer of clarity in her eyes but mostly they find themselves interacting with the equivalent of a wall. Jester tries desperately to engage with her. She offers art supplies, she reads filthy romance novels out loud, and silently she asks the Traveler for help reaching out to Lexia.

“She always looks super sad like even sadder than Caleb and just blank? She can’t talk and she won’t smile and I don’t know what to do!” He doesn’t answer.

Veth tries to talk to her, but any questions that are not deemed serious and direct are mostly ignored.

“Do you need anything?”

She shakes her head.

“Do you want anything?”

No response.

Eventually they discover the best way to interact with her is to ask for her help with simple household things. Cooking, cleaning, gardening.

“Ah Lexia I was just coming to find you.” Caduceus ducks into the bedroom where Lexia spends most of her time. “Will you help me with the garden up top there’s some stubborn weeds that need a good talking to.”

She cocks her head slightly before nodding without looking up at him.

“Excellent.”

Beau tries to help her build some strength but she finds that any amount of traning is difficult with an unresponsive student.

“You’re still wobbly as fuck.” The statement comes from Beau as she leans on the doorframe of her and Jester’s bedroom which has recently become Lexia and Jester’s bedroom. No biggie since Yasha offered to share with Beau and Beau _happily_ obliged. “Listen, you’re squishier than our resident wizard and that’s almost impressive…and yeah someone beat up on you and that’s shitty but if you stay a skinny, weak, noodle wizard than nothing is going to change. Caduceus said you haven’t been eating and Caleb’s been up every night with your sleepless ass. Jester keeps reading to you and bringing you paint and shit and are you trying to get better? Because it _really_ doesn’t seem like it.”

Lexia is sitting on the bed both scarred hands are folded in her lap. Beau’s words are harsh but they wash over her like she doesn’t even hear them. She’s still floating through a haze and the only notable difference between this place and where she was before is that now her mist of indifference isn’t permeated with discomfort and pain. All the voices, except the one that belongs to Beauregard, sound kind and patient. Warm, soothing sounds that promise safety in their timbre even though their exact meaning is ultimately unimportant.Of course, a specific tone of seriousness or urgency will sometimes catch her attention and then she’ll purposefully focus all her mental energy to listen, understand, and write her response with a clarity and eloquence unexpected from someone who is unable to speak or even make eye contact properly.

Written words though they stay the same, they will always have meaning for her.

A few days after her arrrival Caleb sits down to ask her a question.

“Guten morgen schatz.”

The familiar language and term of endearment prompts a small flickering smile.

Seeing that he decides to write out his question in Zemnian hoping that this will give her more confidence to answer openly.

_With your permission I would like to inform Jester of your injury since she may be able to restore it._

Lexia absorbs the question and responds briskly.

_That is fine you may tell her_

Caleb smiles. He can tell that she’s still lost and hurting and there is plenty they don’t know about where she came from and how she ended up here. But what he does know is that she isn’t as far gone as the others may think. Lexia continuously demonstrates an ability to think for herself and assert herself to some degree.Her choice to withhold information is not driven by fear but by calculation. She is choosing to keep her cards close to her chest which should make him more wary but more than anything it makes him proud and maybe even a little guilty? She came out of Ikithon’s program with her identity intact so why couldn’t he?

Caleb quickly pushes those thoughts away remembering the scourger they encountered who had fallen past the point of redemption and the sincerity in Astrid’s eyes when she insisted that Ikithon’s training and methods had been for the best. When he finally shakes himself out of those spiralling thoughts he sees that Lexia is stll holding the quill and is using it to draw out a combination of words and basic arcane symbols.Individually they make sense but pushed together they start to create something new. When she notices his attention she scribbles through it and pushes the quill and parchment away shuddering and shuttering herself back behind her well crafted wall.

He notices but doesn’t say anything. Instead he sends a quick message, “Ah, Jester could you come to your room for a moment please?” She immediately comes skipping into the bedroom.

“Hi Lexia, Hi Caleb you said you needed me?”

“Ah y-yes well uh Lexia needs she has…her voice, she’s still I-I think you could help…” He trails off staring out the window, uncertain how he should tell Jester about the injury. _What if she asks what happened? What if she asks who did it? What if…_

Caleb hears Jester gasp and he doesn’t have to look up to gather that Lexia decided to show her the injury.

“Oh nononono I-I can fix this right? I can fix this. Yeah…totally umm I can cast s-something ummm oh shit oh shit oh shit I think uh I should talk to the Traveler.. Yeah! He will DEFINITELY be able to help you…”

Jester squeezes her hand while setting up her ritual.

“Traveler?”

**Jester** ****

“Hi so umm do you know how to give someone their tongue back? Is that like a Cure Wounds kinda spell or like Greater Restoration? I mean that one seems to work for most stuff but this seems…worse.”

**I’m going to count that as two questions so I can give you a slightly less vague response.First off, you can help her, Greater Restoration will be the most effective, but it will take some time and consistency, but you my dear are more than capable. Anything else?** ****

“Oh boy I still have another question right?” She blows a raspberry through her lips trying to think of good questions to ask. “Can I saaave it?”

**Usually no, but I suppose I can make an exception for you my dear. Its not like I haven’t already broken all the rules of divinity already? Am I right?** ****

“Awesome great you’re the coolest thank yoouuu.”

She turns back toward Lexia, “So, I’m gonna cast Greater Restoration and it’s not gonna work today but it WILL work. I promise. Alright, I’m gonna touch you now, is that okay?”

Lexia bobs her head once agreeing but not really believing that any amount of healing magic can restore what she lost. Jester gently cups her face letting her magic flow into her. Lexia can feel the magic bubbling and tugging gently at the back of her throat and then…nothing.She glances upward and Jester is shaking and crying.

“I’m sorry I’m sorry I’ll fix it I promise I just can’t do it right away.” A small rough hand pulls blue fingers away from her face but she doesn’t let go immediately. She squeezes until the tears choke off with a final sob and Jester wraps her in a gentle hug. “I’m going to heal you I promise.” ****

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed!


	7. A Time for Healing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If there's any interest I might be able to do a double update today to make up for the delays???

Everyday Jester casts the restoration and everyday the sensation increases but ultimately fades away. This new development makes Jester more determined to find some way to make Lexia smile. But, every story, joke, and drawing is still met mostly with indifference. 

Beau has slightly more luck, she tracks down some exciting and much more age appropriate reading material. Lexia actually looks her in the eye which is the closest thing she can manage that approximates gratitude. Beau plays it off like it isn’t a big deal but she takes mental notes to report back to the others.

“Yeah you know not everyone is into Jester’s taste in literature so I thought I’d bring you some other options. We don’t really have a ton of fiction and shit I mean we have some but Caleb has most of the books and his are mostly spell books and magic theory? Whatever the fuck that means.”

Her eyes light up at the mention of magic theory. Beau notices hiding a smirk, “I can ask him what he has if you’re interested?”

She nods excitedly. Likewise, Caleb earns himself a genuine smile when he returns with books, parchment, and a quill.

“I brought some supplies if you want to take notes or anything else.”She happily accepts the offerings and immediately begins poring through the texts scribbling notes in the margins. Caleb watches the nib of the quill press into the upper corner of a page and winces slightly but he doesn’t say anything. She doesn’t notice, she is fully engrossed by a text titled “The Structure of Arcana”. Without realizing it her fingers have begun to trace symbols on the bedsheets beside her, Caleb sees and smiles to himself deciding to leave her in peace to enjoy the books.

For the next few weeks Lexia finds different ways to occupy herself. Reading alone mostly in Jester;s bedroom although sometimes Caleb will find her curled up on the rooftop or in the library. Once or twice Beau and Veth will convince her to go for a walk around the grounds and occasionally she’ll sit with Jester while she paints and schemes. But almost every day she’ll be in the kitchen helping Caduceus prepare meals.

Gradually she shows signs of being more at ease. No more flinching when someone reaches toward her unless its unexpected. She tries to make eye contact more often, but she still doesn’t initiate contact or conversation, and she’s always tense when Jester casts her healing magic no matter how slow and gentle the blue tiefling tries to be.

Almost a week after she arrived Jester comes in to cast her daily restoration carrying an armful of clean bandages. “I thought I could help you change them out, since the ones you have on are kinda stinky now.”

Lexia runs her hands run over the bandages which are nearly threadbare and stiff with dried blood. The words reach her andLexia reaches out to take the clean cloths but she refuses Jester’s help even going so far as to write out her request.

_I can change them myself_

“Okaaaay but I’m here if you need any help I’m really good at making it so they’re not wrapped too tight or too loose and I can add pretty bows if you want?”

_I want to do it myself_

“Fiiine you’re just like Beau and Caleb they almost never ask for help but I mean they have been asking for _my_ help sometimes but I have to squeeze it out of them or sometimes I’ll just blink my eyes and look really sad at Caleb and then he turns red and lets me help him.” She pauses thinking for a moment and catching her breath.“So do you want me to heal you before or after?”

Lexia shrugs. Jester’s healing magic had been helpful initially, by now the aching is gone and even the unexpected twinges of pain have mostly died away. At this point she’s accepted that her mouth isn’t something that can be fixed. She keeps trying to tell herself that she doesn’t need a voice to have a purpose. But years of living as a protector, then a student, and ultimately an experiment tell a different story. Her voice has always been instrumental; an asset when studying magic and her greatest weapon when she faced choices and lies far bigger than herself. Until she lost it, it defined her and now that its gone she isn’t sure if she wants new purpose, or new definition. She just wants a reason to live, is that purpose? It feels like it's more. After all, a conduit has purpose and a lab rat has purpose but they have no reason to keep existing. And she wants to _want_ to live not just exist. But most things are still so blurred and sounds only sharpen occasionally. Everything else is white noise.

While she’s been internally debating Jester has begun casting her healing magic, the second it takes hold Lexia instinctually shudders. Jester hesitates but finishes the spell before folding the strips of cloth and setting them neatly at the edge of the bed. “Just yell if you need anything!” She closes the bedroom door carefully behind her. Lexia discards the bandages and rewraps her arms quickly stalling her thoughts and continuing to refuse Jester’s help. 

About a week and a half after her arrival Yasha bumps into Lexia reading on the rooftop and notices that she is staring at the page but her gaze is empty. Like Molly when he’d wake up from a nightmare, coughing and gasping words that made no sense. 

“Lexia, are you all right?”

Lexia shudders for a moment her vision is still tilted inward until she looks up acknowledging the gentle wild woman in front of her.For a moment the Xhorhaus rooptop had closed in. Trellis and softly swinging vines became damp stone walls with chains hanging menacingly and she couldn’t move she was burning no…freezing no it didn’t matter it was all some type of inescapable, subservient pain.

“Lexia?”

Her lightly accented voice cuts through again, Lexia shakes her head trying to clear away the memories still half caught up in the disparate images. Mindlessly her lips form words she forgot she cannot voice.

“ _Yasha I’m…”_

Reality crashes fully down and her eyes prick with tears. She stands up and pushes past the tall woman who is strong enough to stop her but kind enough not to. Caduceus is left to prepare dinner alone. Veth brings up a meal and leaves it outside the door. Its still there when she passes Jester’s room on her way to bed. Jester brings it with her into the bedroom when she goes to cast restoration for the day. When she gets there Lexia is fast asleep. She looks so peaceful and whatever she’s dreaming about is actually making her smile.

“Ohh man she’s gonna freak if she wakes up…”

Jester makes a decision and steels herself casting the magic while Lexia is still sound asleep. Thankfully, she doesn’t stir. Jester breathes an audible sigh of relief and smiles down at the tranquil form sprawled under the covers. She kisses her on the forehead and crawls into her own bed pleased with the decision and readying herself for another day of extreme patience and hopefully some chaos.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you're still enjoying yourselves!


	8. Her Voice

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys this story is turning out to be one part plot drama and one part Mighty Nein shenanigans. But I LOVE dreaming up their crazy conversations and after Travelercon nothing seems too far fetched ;P

Lexia wakes up gasping, and coughing and there’s a horrible taste in her mouth and she can’t breathe, she thinks she might be choking. She sits up and leans over the edge of the bed dry heaving. The sound wakes her roommate and the adjoining door bangs open startling her. Her head snaps up and she sits back so fast that she bites down hard on her tongue. She cries out, her mouth fills with the taste of iron, _blood,_ and her mind goes into overdrive processing the sensation.

“Lexia what’s wrong, what happened? I heard you scream are you okay? Did you have a nightmare? Are you hurt? Are you sick?” Jester rushes to her bedside and immediately presses her cool blue hands to Lexia’s face searching for a fever or any injuries. Lexia is sobbing no…is she laughing? She looks up at Jester with tears running down her face.

“I-I bit my tongue.”

Her voice comes out raspy and horribly disused, but it’s a _voice_. She’s being _heard_.

“You-you’re talking? You’re talking!”

Jester wraps her in a tight hug and Lexia lets her, still laughing and crying almost hysterically.

“We should go tell the others! No wait…let’s surprise them! I mean if you want I just think they’re going to be SO EXCITED!”

“S-Sure?”

Jester grabs her hand and they both make their way quietly downstairs. It’s early in the morning and the Xhorhouse is unusually quiet.

“Oh man, everyone’s still asleep.” Lexia walks into the kitchen and throws up her dancing lights. They beautifully illuminate the neat little kitchen, her eyes rove over the dangling pots and pans and the herbs dried and carefully hung from the ceiling.

“I think I’m going to make everyone breakfast.”

“Ooh yes! Do you know how to make pastries? I mean its okay if you don’,I found all the best bakeries in Rosohna we can go out and…oh OH you haven’t seen any other parts of Rosohna yet! I wonder if we can bring you to the Lucid Bastion? It’s super pretty and you should meet Essek he’s our friend most of the time…we’re working on it.”

Lexia smiles a little she’s already started pulling out ingredients.“I could make streusel…it is not usually eaten with breakfast and I’ve never been very good with pastries…”

“Don’t worry we’ll get some later and then we also should get you some new clothes and maybe Caleb can help you find some wizard stuff like you probably need a spellbook and a little bag with all your magic ingredients and a magic coat to hold mud and molasses or maybe that’s just Caleb?”

Lexia starts to nod along with Jester’s suggestions but she catches herself. Taking a deep breath, “That sounds good”. Her voice is still crackly and foreign it almost hurts but its a blessing.

“Okay you stay in here and I’ll keep everyone else out of the kitchen. Sound good?”

“Yes, that should work well.”

Words have never been a struggle but now it feels like she’s relearning how to string together coherent sentences. It’s frustrating but it’s something worth doing, and worth relearning. The frustration is a welcome change from apathy.

Once everyone is awake Jester gets the rest of the Mighty Nein to sit down around the dining room table and wait for breakfast to be served.

“I mean she’s not gonna poison us or anything?” Beau smirks leaning back too far in her chair. 

Jester rolls her eyes in fake exasperation. “C’mon Beau that joke was old like at least a week ago.”

“Sorry, sorry.” The chair slips but her reflexes save her and the much abused floorboards.

Yasha cranes her neck toward the kitchen. “Do you know what she is making?”

“Well no, but she’s been helping Caduceus cook every day so I’m sure it’ll be good.”

Veth looks skeptical and leans over to Caleb and Yasha whispering. “This is the kind of thing when your kid draws a picture and it’s just colored scribbles on a piece of parchment and you tell them that it is _the most beautiful_ work of art that you’ve ever seen and you smile and they smile and everyone’s happy.But, just be prepared for it to taste _awful_.”

Yasha nods solemnly and Caleb smiles at Veth’s advice.Lexia emerges from the kitchen still wearing the ratty, loose tunic they found her in, but with clean bandages and a plateful of what look like pancakes? She’s still a little unsteady and her strength is rebuilding slowly, but something about the way she takes in the room and looks at each of them makes it seem like new life was breathed into her. She sets the platter down on the table.

“I-I made eierkuchen to thank you for…everything.”

Hearing her speak Caleb, Beau, and Caduceus all stand up immediately, looking equal parts happy and surprised.Fjord, Yasha, and Veth sit back processing the moment. Fjord is the first to respond. “You, you can speak now?”

Lexia wraps her arms around herself but looks him straight in the eye before looking over at the beaming blue tiefling. “Jester healed me.”

Caleb looks at Jester and then at Lexia before tilting his head quizzically toward the food.“You made eierkuchen? I haven’t had that since I was a little boy.”

“What is it exactly, they look like very thin pancakes?” Yasha looks at the food with a bit of excitement, she’s loved pancakes ever since their first hero’s feast.

“Y-yes they are similar they’re not as sweet but Caduceus has some jam and you can put chocolate or fruit on them I thought they could be good since you can put things on them ah according to your taste?”

“Oooh they sound super good! Can I use some of your jam Caduceus?”

“Of course.” Caduceus goes to pull out a jar of green jelly, and begins passing it around the table.

Fjord squints suspiciously at the jam, “Uh what is in this again?”

“It’s a blend of seaweed and brambleberry it’s something new I’ve been working on.”

Veth takes a heaping spoonful to drown her ‘pancake’ in but when she bites into there is a look of immediate regret. She mutters under her breath between gulps of water. “I’ve made a terrible mistake.”

Jester eats a small spoonful and makes a squished face that she immediately tries to hide. “Um wow, Caduceus it’s super salty but uh it’s good”. She gives him an enthusastic thumbs up that does not match her strained expression.

Caleb, Fjord, and Beau spread a mixed berry compote on their pancakes and look quite satisfied with themselves. Veth is mournfully nibbling on her soaked through pancake and Jester has slyly grabbed a plain one and is covering it in berries and chocolate.

“If you don’t like it you can just say so.I made it as an experiement.”

Veth moans, “I’m eating an experiment?!”

Caduceus shrugs, “My feelings won’t be hurt.”

Jester starts to say something, but Yasha sheepishly cuts in. “I actually think its quite good.”

Fjord eyes the salty concoction, “Well, while I’m grateful I think perhaps this particular blend of flavors is not…universally appreciated. Also I can tell from just looking at it that there is way too much seaweed in that shit.”

“Thank you, I appreciate your honesty.” He looks at Yasha and Fjord and then pointedly at Jester who is shrunk down in her seat sheepishly devouring her chocolately breakfast treat. Meanwhile, Lexia sits at the table between Caleb and Yasha, she eats hers plain, all the while watching and listening to the Great Jam Debate with a special sort of delight. All the haze has finally faded away. Words come out and come in clearly.The world is suddenly brighter and warmer and worth living in and exploring.

“I-I’d like to try Cauduceus’ jam?” It looks very strange but her rediscovered voice has rekindled her insatiable curiosity. Thankfully, her request is met with a chorus of well meaning discouragement.

Caleb leans over and whispers in Zemnian. “I would stick to the berries if I were you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed the double update! And thank you to all the kind commenters, I see you! You all keep this fic moving and also you make my day <3


	9. Is This a Shopping Episode

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The muse was in a coma

“Lexia here put on this cloak and these boots! Oh wait those don’t fit ummm don’t worry we’ll get you some way better ones also ALSO Caleb is going to bamf us to Zadash so we can find you all sorts of magic stuff. We have a friend there who is the greatest we’re like his favorite customers.” Jester hands Lexia a pile of clothing.

Lexia takes the cloak looking a little overwhelmed. “I-I really don’t need anything you’ve all done more than…”

Jester interrupts waving away her protests. “Oh please we have soooo much money and you reaaaallly need new clothes I think those still have blood on them.She wrinkles her nose and gently pinches the fabric.

“Well sure then that’s fine”. She smiles at Jester slowly getting more excited and completely giving into the tiefling’s enthusiasm.

Jester ducks her head out into the hallway shouting, “CAYLEB, VETH, BEAU ARE YOU READY YET?”

Jester sees Beau stumbles out of Yasha’s room halfway into her expositor’s vest. “I’m ready I’m ready geez. Where are we going again?” 

“Shopping remember?”

Lexia peeks her head out and hears several sets of footsteps making their way downstairs. Fjord looks less enthused than Jester. “Listen Veth the only reason I’m going is because I want to see what Pumat has in stock.”

Veth danced down the stairs in front of him turning back to say in a sing song teasing tone “You li-ike shopping”.

Fjord rolls his eyes and Caleb breaks off from them to approach Lexia. “Is there anything in particular you are looking for?”

She shakes her head, “No, I-well maybe a dress?”

He smiles andthe corner of his eyes crinkle slightly with genuine joy. He looks over at Jester who is hopping back in forth from one foot to the other anticipation sparking in her violet eyes.

“I think that can be arranged ja.”

It takes about an hour to make their way to the market district of Rosohna. They’re speed is still limited by Lexia’s ongoing recovery.Plenty of local dissidents eye the additional human with suspicion but not unkindness. They recognize the Mighty Nein by reputation. Jester is still vibrating with excitement darting from shop to shop appraising their options. Lexia is looking around completely wide-eyed and a little wary of the strangers they’re passing in the street.

“Hmm this one is too small, and that one only has dark and gloomy clothes ohhh Lexia do you like dark clothes or do you prefer really pretty bright colors?”

She looks slightly confused responding “Umm I don’t think so, I guess bright colors are nice?”

“Okay!”

She continues to try and find the perfect place to find Lexia a new dress.

“What about this one?”

Yasha walks up to a store front pointing at a dress in the display.Everyone looks over to see a full skirted madder red sleeveless pinafore dress with tiny white flowers embroidered around the hem draped over a creamy blouse with slightly billowing sleeves that come to a tight cuff at the wrists.Lexia slowly approaches the glass window eyes wide as she takes it in.

“Oooh that looks super pretty, do you like it?”

Lexia’s hand is pressed up against the glass still admiring the dress. “It’s…beautiful.” Jester grabs her other hand and gently tugs her inside the shop. She and Veth fuss over size and inquire about shoes while Lexia holds the dress almost reverently stroking the unbelievably velvety soft exterior.

“So, bad news they don’t have any shoes in this shop bu-ut they have tons of other dresses and you definitely need more than one.

“I-I do?”

Jester nods. “By the way how are your feet?”

Lexia looks down, “Fine, I guess?”

“Do they hurt at all? My boots definitely do NOT fit you.”

“Oh I suppose they are a bit tight?”

Jester and Veth tug her towards a bench outside the shop to sit down and remove the boots. She removes her borrowed shoes and stockings. “I mean they look fine don’t they?”

“Oh no they’re getting all blistered shit okay umm how about Veth, Beau, and I stay here and grab you some more dresses and stuff and Caleb, Fjord, and Caduceus can help find some new boots? Those are probably much easier to find.”

“But I really don’t need more clothes than this.”

Beau snorts “Uh yeah you do.”

Lexia blushes and doesn’t respond. Veth gives her a look that says 'trust us'. She nods pulling the boots back on and walking out of the shop with the boys.It doesn’t take long to find a shoe shop and a pair of sturdy boots. About the time they make their purchase Jester catches up with Beau and Veth in tow all three of them are carrying large bags filled with clothing. Lexia’s eyes double in size as Jester holds out the coveted dress placing it next to the newly purchased boots. “I think you should go try them on!”

“Y-Yes okay!” She takes the clothes and rushes to find a room to try them on. They have to go to a shop next door but a few minutes later she emerges wearing the full ensemble and absolutely beaming with happness.

“I-I’ve never had something so pretty not even before…” The light in her eyes dims slightly and she winces but quickly shakes away the threatening flood of fragmented memories. “Thank you so much.” She holds out the dress and spins a little almost giddily, gratitude shining in her eyes. Even Beau smiles at that.

Caleb puts a hand on her head which is still unevenly shorn and messy. “Wunderschön”. 

Together begin to make their way back to the Xhorhouse but halfway there Jester stops suddenly in the middle of the street.

“A-Are you okay?” Lexia asks concerned. Jester but nods but doesn’t reply right away. The rest of the Nein recognize her particular level of concentration and surmise that she is receiving a sending spell.

She cocks her head while listening and wrinkles her brow trying to commit each and every word to memory.

“Guys its from Essek he just sent me a super important message.” Jester attempts to do her best Essek impression.

“The Bright Queen requires your presence at the Lucid Bastion immediately, the cause is urgent regarding the tenative peace between the Dynasty and the Empire.”The last bit comes out slowly and more carefully than the rest.“That’s all he said.” She pitches her voice far too low and the Nicodranian lilt sneaks in despite her best efforts.

The whole group is silent until Beau exclaims “Well what are you waiting for? Call him back and ask him what happened! Did the war re-start, did someone get attacked what’s going on?”

Jester quickly responds to the spell only slightly outpacing the twenty-five word limit. “He just says to come quickly and the Bright Queen will explain it herself.”Beau frowns at the distinct lack of information and Caleb begins mapping out the fastest way to the Lucid Bastion. Everyone else looks like fall somewhere in between the categories of uncomfortable and concerned. Fjord mutters mostly to himself looking at Lexia and then at the rest of the Mighty Nein. “I don’t like this one bit.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't write fluff often if it lacks the marshmallowy goodness of Sarenrae pls forgive me


	10. A Royal Summoning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Bright Queen requests the Mighty Nein's help finding the missing student and resolving the unrest between the nations.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really sorry I promise I haven't abandoned this story I haven't had writers block this bad since high school but I'm trying to do better the story is fully plotted I just have to WRITE IT. Also yes I am referencing Lilli Furfaro's brilliant songwork bc they are amazing and you should listen to all of them! Artists support artists! -K.Kelly

It doesn’t take long for them to make their way to the Lucid Bastion.The guards outside eye them warily despite their status in the Dynasty.Before they arrived Beau strongly suggested that Lexia put Jester’s cloak back on.“Humans aren’t exactly favored in Rosohna so its better for you to keep a low profile since you don’t share our reputation yet”.

Lexia immediately pulled on the cloak and hood over her new dress. “Understood, I’ll be sure not to draw attention to myself.”

The cloak honestly didn’t help much. A well-armed Kryn soldier quickly approaches them obviously noting their extra member. “Halt, who is that? Only the Mighty Nein have curried favor with the Bright Queen.”Caleb steps in.

“Ja, she is with the Mighty Nein we are a growing group and uh we are always out looking for new talent.” 

Jester cocks her head squinting at the unfamiliar guard. “What’s your name I don’t think we’ve met you before?”

He sighs deeply and does not even look down at the precocious tiefling. He gives the small cloaked figure a hard look.“My name is Karsyn I am the head of her majesty’s royal guard and you should know that if you had not been summoned by the Bright Queen herself I would have you immediately escorted to the Dungeon of Penance for your insolence.”

Caleb nods in acknowledgement as they pass through the gates. Beau gives a curt salute. Lexia keeps her head down and hurries inside shielded by the rest of the Nein from the severity of the guards.

As they enter they are quickly ushered into the Queen’s Cathedral where Leylas Kryn is seated above the Drow court. Standing below the throne is the Shadowhand Essek Thelyss.

Her rich resonating voice fills the rooms as she addresses them. “Mighty Nein, I thank you for your presence. Sadly, our meetings rarely constitute peaceful tidings. There has been a…”

She pauses considering her choice of words. “…A thinly veiled threat from the Empire as well as an unfounded accusation.” She gestures toward Essek, “The message was received by Shadowhand Thelyss.”

Essek steps forward as if on cue and provides the remaining details, “The Cerberus Assembly has openly accused the Kryn Dynasty of kidnapping one of the Soltryce Academy’s most promising arcane students and thereby breaking the peace treaty through a clear act of hostility. An ultimatum has been presented, if the student known simply as Lexia is not returned to the custody of Master Trent Ikithon in ten days the war will resume as if it had never ceased.” He proceeds to give a brief description of the student’s appearance and the Mighty Nein struggle to maintain neutral expressions.

Instinctively Jester and Caleb crowd protectively toward Lexia and the rest of the Nein follow their lead. They both bristle at the word ‘custody’. 

Essek steps back and the Bright Queen takes the time to make eye contact with each member of the Mighty Nein her eyebrows rise slightly and her gaze narrows at the eighth unaccounted for member. But she passes over without further acknowledgement. “I implore you Mighty Nein for your assistance in locating this person and I require that as allies of the Dynasty you relinquish all information that you find…”

She trails off momentarily as she once again eyes the figure suspiciously, appraising her size and shape even more carefully.

“As well as any information you may already happen to possess. Knowing this I would like to speak to each of you individually to assess your knowledge and determine how you may best continue to aid the Dynasty.”

Lexia can feel herself shrinking down trying desperately not be seen.Cold dread is pooling in her stomach.

“Expositor Lionette I will speak with you first.”

\--------

Beau calls on every ounce of her training to school her features to complete neutrality and to stop the chorus of _fuckfuckfuckfuck_ echoing in her mind as Essek offers a near perfect physical description of their latest rescue project. She almost doesn’t hear the Queen address her but her passive awareness is still high enough to catch the pointed invitation and then to dazedly follow the queen and a pair of guards into an adjoining room.Even without consulting the rest of the Nein Beau is absolutely certain that none of them are willing to relinquish Lexia back into the Assembly’s clutches. The queen settles herself in a much smaller and less impressive throne, but her presence has not lost any of its weight despite the change in scenery.

“Expositor were you aware of this disturbance?”

“No, I wasn’t.”

“Does the Cobalt Soul have jurisdiction regarding this kind of conflict?”

“We deal in information not children.” Her even tone gains an audible edge.

“The Dynasty does not deal in children and I would hope the Empire does not either. We have no interest in their academic prodigies."

Beau cannot hold back a snort since she knows exactly how the Empire treats children. And the mention of prodigies reminds her of Caleb’s description of his classmates, ' _we were so bright'_.

The queen's sharp voice refocuses her on the task at hands. “Tell me Expositor, with your knowledge of the Empire and the Dynasty what do you surmise regarding the Assembly’s intentions?”

Yeah no, Beau is not about to start theorizing in front of royalty. The more she says the more likely it is that she’ll unintentionally give something away. Monks of the Cobalt Soul are trained to safeguard information and she had to learn the hard way that sometimes the best safety measure is sheer silence.

“All due respect your majesty but I’m here to deliver facts and in that respect I’ll help out where I can, but I’m not gonna start throwing around wild theories.That won’t help anyone. Trust me.”

“I see, but from what I understand your wild theories have a tendency to be uncannily close to the truth. Is that correct?”

_Fuuuuuuck_

Beau almost forgot that Essek had spied on them for weeks almost months before the Peace Accords.She hasn’t felt this off her game since they had dinner with Ickythong.The Bright Queen is looking at her expectantly, Beau returns the gaze evenly no trace of hesitation in her expression.

“Very well then.”

\---------------

Veth can feel her fingers twitching when they lead her to the adjoining chamber to speak with Leylas Kryn alone. It’s not the same feeling as the itch, its not the desire to steal, to possess, to hoard. Rather, its a latent fury because this woman was responsible for her husband’s…mistreatment and her son’s fear and her family’s further trauma.And despite everything they’ve accomplished she is still struggling to see the difference between wartime and peacetime in Wildemount.It seems more like a formality than anything else. Both sides are lined with gunpowder and ready to reignite at the slightest provocation. Its selfish and meaningless, politics prioritized over people’s lives.

“Nott…”

“My name is Veth Brenatto.”

“Of course. Well, Veth Brenatto as a hero of the Dynasty you have proven yourself a reliable and _honest_ ally. I sincerely hope you have useful information to contribute that will help us resolve this…issue.”

Veth immediately starts sweating. 

“I don’t know anything about anything really, I’m more in the reconaissance business I find things but Beau and Caleb keep track of the nitty gritty details.”

The queen’s interest piques when she mentions Caleb’s name.

"But more Beau than Caleb or anyone else!” Veth rushes to amend her statement when she sees a slight twitch of the queen’s lips.

“Interesting, that is quite good to know. Thank you Veth Brenatto for your contribution.”

She dismisses Veth and as she makes her way back to the throne room and the rogue overhears the queen’s next order. 

“Bring me the wizard…and the other one.”

Veth dashes back to the Nein.

“Caleb!”

The panic in her voice visibly shakes him.

“What? What is it?”

Before Veth has a chance to respond a guard approaches Caleb and Lexia. Instinctively Caleb grabs Lexia by the arm and swings her behind him, still trying to block her from any hostile prying eyes. They glare at him, but he doesn’t flinch. The Mighty Nein can afford to be written off as suspicious, but Lexia cannot afford to be found out, he hopes his personal reputation for being on the skittish side will be enough to explain his actions. 

“You two.”

“Yes?”

Caleb feels the jump in his heartrate.Its audacious to play dumb and pretend he hasn’t been expecting to be summoned and questioned even though Veth's reaction startled him.

“The queen will speak with you now.”

Caleb nods and looks at Lexia who is still staring at the cracked marble floor. Memorizing invisible patterns and maybe muttering unheard prayers. He gently tugs her and she follows him woodenly into the side room, barely in step with the guards. When they enter Leylas looks up, smiles at them and makes a quick sign to the guard. Caleb doesn’t recognize the motion, its not arcane. Suddenly, one of the guards flanking them moves between Caleb and Lexia, and before they can react one of the guards steps up behind Lexia and yanks off her hood. She cries out surprised and tries desperately to grab it back. The guard seizes both of her wrists and pulls her out of arms reach even as the other one quickly restrains Caleb. The queen stands up, moving away from her throne until she is staring down at the frightened girl. 

“Child of the Empire, you are not welcome in the Dynasty, your presence is a threat to our peace.”


	11. Loyalties Questioned

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Mighty Nein find themselves playing defense for both Lexia and themselves.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alrighty, I think I am finally getting back into a rhythm. Expect an update at least once a week from now on. Also SPOILERS (sorta) for the Explorers Guide to Wildemount.

The rest of the Mighty Nein are quickly ushered back into the side room.On entry they see Caleb and Lexia each bound to a heavy chair with a guard standing over them.Veth flies at the armored Kryn nearest to Caleb scratching towards his eyes with a ferocity that suggests she still has her old claws. Before she can cause any real damage Yasha scoops her up and away. Fjord surveys the scene and quickly puts an arm out to try and stop Jester and Beau from rushing in as well.

“Now hold on, lets all just wait a second before we start jumping to any conclusions.” His clipped, polished tone attempts to smooth over the building tension, but Veth practically spits at him.“Are you fucking blind?!Look, LOOK at them! They tied them up, she said they were just going to talk and she tied them up!”She scrabbles frantically in Yasha’s grip, squirming, and swearing in her thwarted attempts reach Caleb.

Beau looks around, Caleb and Lexia’s heads are bowed, resigned to their current positions. “Hey, your majesty.” The queen looks over at Beau. “What the fuck?” She gestures to the ropes binding Caleb and Lexa which are almost cruelly tight. The harsh material is definitely cutting into their skin and it would be leaving red burns in its wake if both prisoners had not been well trained to handle circumstances like these.Their stony silence and deceptively calm demeanors add fuel to her fury.At this point it seems like all attempts at diplomacy have been temporary abandoned, Fjord winces but he doesn’t try to correct her.

The queen looks amused and completely unruffled by Veth’s violent reaction. Her gaze travels over the faces of concern and undisguised fury before settling on Beau.“We had an agreement Expositor.I promised you freedom in exchange for loyalty. Although I suppose, you have kept that agreement to a point.”

Beau’s jaw is working back and forth grinding away at harsh words that won’t help them get them out of here alive. She watches as the queen rises from her pseudo throne. A silence more sudden and oppresive than any arcane ability descends on the room as her robes whisper across the marble. She positions herself between Caleb and Lexia with her back to rest of the Nein. “Today however, you crossed a line. Today all of you have betrayed our trust. _My_ trust. You harbored an enemy of the Dynasty and threatened the tennets of our peace.” Her positioning makes it clear that her icy words are being directed mostly at Caleb, but he hasn’t looked up at her. She turns to look over shoulder at the others, her voice gradually getting higher and thinner until it borders on being shrill.“Tell me, Mighty Nein, was there anything that this _child_ promised you which could possibly compel you to break my trust so thoroughly? If so, I’d very much like to hear what it was.” The queen takes her time circling behind Lexia, her long dark nails scrape over the back of the chair, but the girl remains unmoved and does not acknowledge her words or her presence.Beau looks to Fjord and Jester, silently asking _What now_?

A cough breaks the heavy silence. “W-We have never sworn our loyalties to the Empire or the Dynasty,” Everyone immediately turns toward Caleb. His voice is quiet with a slight rasp of dryness. He doesn’t lift his head, but his words tumble out with increasing surety. “Whenever we are given the chance to some good we try to do it.” He finally raises his head but his gaze goes past the queen to look directly at Lexia.“She does not belong to the Assembly and when we met she was no longer a freestanding student of the Soltryce Academy.She had been mistreated and she was in need of help. I made sure that the only risk we posed was to ourselves.”

Her majesty stalks toward Caleb her usually impassive features twitching with amusement and obvious frustration. “Well that is simply no longer true and while I do believe you, it remains a fact that you withheld her identity after it was made known to you that her presence was a viable threat to the Dynasty. How will you answer for that choice?” She takes the time to capture the gaze of each member of the Mighty Nein one by one, forcing them to recall their recent attempt at deceit.She looks back at Caleb last, he does not waver under her sight. “Answer me.”

He stretches from his slumped over position in the chair and suddenly the power in the room shifts. “I did not believe and I still do not believe that any nation willing to sacrifice children is worth protecting.”

She scoffs. “One child in exchange for peace, doesn’t that seem fair to you?”

“That is not a peace worth preserving.” His eyes are blazing. The straight back and unwavering tone he wears belong to a different man entirely.

The queen looks ready to press further, but Beau quickly interrupts. “Wait, you don’t seriously think the assembly’s promise of peace is genuine?You know whole schtick about ‘returning their prized student’ is just an excuse to restart the war? If you surrender on this front, they’ll just find a new excuse.If you really want peace then we need to focus on cutting out the root of the issue, the Assembly.”

Caleb nods and licks his lips nervously. He shudders a little catching himself slipping into old habits. As a result his composure slips ever so slightly. “If uh the handling of this uh circumstance as we stand now p-proves to be the Dynasty’s standard then I can personally you assure that the Mighty Nein will not longer be at your service.”

Her arched eyebrows rise ever so slightly. “Are you threatening me Caleb Widogast?”

He ignores the question. “We uphold our right to choose who we work for, we have more than attoned for our initial debt.” 

A tinny almost unnatural laugh echoes through the room. “Entering my court in such a manner as you did is punishable by death. Therefore,The Mighty Nein owe me a life debt which cannot be repaid.”

Caleb frowns. “I do not recall those terms being laid out so clearly…”

“I AM NOT FINISHED”. 

Caleb clamps his mouth shut obediently, but his face is unabashedly unimpressed. Her majesty stares him down, he meets her gaze evenly without blinking or looking away.

Her sudden escalation is uncharacteristic and even the queen seems a bit suprised by her own outburst. She takes a moment to compose herself before continuing. “Given your previous show of loyalty I think we may be able to come to an agreement, I will graciously allow you three days…”

“Seven!” Beau blurts out almost without thinking.“Give us seven days your majesty to renegotiate the peace.”

She whirls toward Beau trembling with a silent fury. “If the peace is as fragile as you insist then I’d sooner see you take down the Cerberus Assembly.” Her words drip with sarcasm, the reply is tailor made to shame the Expositor into silence, instead she glares back at the queen, more than ready to continue the argument.

Before she can respond Jester cuts in, “Well why not? We know at least two people who can testify that the Assembly is involved in illegal shit and I bet we can find more. We can find proof to bring them down!”

“No matter how _mighty_ you think you are, I doubt you can accomplish as much in three days…” She shakes her head smilng condescendingly down at Jester.

“Seven.” Caleb counters dryly. 

Leylas Kryn throws back her shoulder, raising herself to her full height while standing directly in front of Caleb, forcing him to crane his neck to look up at her.“You have lied to me, betrayed me, and jeopardized the safety of my kingdom, so tell me, why should I continue to put the Dynasty’s peace at risk in order to appease your ridiculous concerns?”

He plays along, meeting her gaze with his neck crooked to the side at an awkward angle. “If we are successful, The Dynasty will receive full credit for declawing the Assembly and your majesty, if I may continue to be so bold, I firmly believe that this proposition actually affords very little risk to the Dynasty. Furthermore, if we return in the allotted week than that should provide an additional three days of uh cushion if you will, at least according to the Assembly’s given instructions. Doesn’t that seem fair to you?”He throws her disdainful words back in her face unapologetically.

The Kryn guard nearest to Caleb moves to backhand him, but the queen raises a hand to stop the retaliation. “Let me be perfectly clear, there exists no scenario in which this child of the Empire…” She spits out the moniker derisively. “…Becomes the downfall of our peace. If you do not return her to the Lucid Bastion by dawn on the seventh day you will be tracked down, executed, all of your family and friends will be arrested for collusion and your property will seized for exclusive use of the Dynasty. Is that all perfectly clear?I’d hate if there were any further misunderstandings.”

Caleb looks around gauging the other’s reactions. Lexia still won’t look at him or anyone else, the rest look stern but determined.Beau nods and he’s certain they’re all in agreement. “We understand and we agree.”

“Very well.” The queen moves back toward her seat brushing past Lexia as she says “Consider this one of your last seven days of grace, I don’t care what you do with the rest.” Her words accompany a sneer.At this point, the facade of grace, elegance, and propriety has mostly shattered.In its place, desperation and a hint of madness ekes through.She motions to Kryn soldiers standing by and without a word they unbind Caleb and then Lexia.Veth almost knocks him over the second he’s back on his feet. “It’s alright liebling I’m all right.”Even after the ropes are removed Lexia stays in the chair, trying to take it all in and understand what is happening.Jester kneels in front of her gently clasping small scarred wrists between blue ink stained fingers.

“Lexia, its alright, we can leave now.Do you need help getting up, are you hurt?”

No response.

Jester chews on her lower lip looking over at Caleb and Veth nervously, rubbing soothing circles on the back of her hands, trying to get her attention. “Oh boy. Umm Lexia can you hear me? Did you go away inside your head? If you did that’s okay just uh squeeze my hand if you can hear me or squeeze twice if you need a sec…”

“Why?” It comes out almost like a sob. “Why are you doing this? You’re going to be in danger. You shouldn’t be. You shouldn’t protect me.”

“She is right, you know.” The queen’s voice floats back across the room. Jester bares her fangs scowling at her, fully prepared to make yet another powerful enemy. The Bright Queen waves a hand, effectively dismissing them.

Jester carefully lifts Lexia out of the chair and half carries half drags her out of the room. By the time they are halfway out of the palace Lexia is mostly back on her feet, but still leaning heavily against Jester.As they pass the lineup of Kryn guards she turns her head and whispers. “Please leave me. I-I don’t want to hurt you.”

Jester shakes her head responding back without hesitation. “Nope.” She pops the ‘p’ matter of factly, and smiles looking around at her friends standing by, fearlessly walking past the dark glares of the guards. “Yeah, we are definitely not gonna do that. Sorry Lexy you’re stuck with us.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hopefully, you enjoyed that. My apologies if the style and/or formatting is a little different I'm trying something new. I like to use FanFiction as an opportunity to grow as a writer so uh things might fluctuate from time to time but I hope its not too distracting! As always kudos and comments are appreciated, I'm sure I'm not the only author who goes back to read comments on rough writing days right? Fellow writers please validate me ;P


	12. The Residuum Connection

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beau and Caleb brainstorm to find a chink in the Assembly's seemingly impenetrable armor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah so I didn't lie about the weekly update thing I just left my laptop at work over the weekend sooooo whoops sorry about that enjoy this very late update. Sorta SPOILERS up until Episode 114 An Open Window.

After arriving back at the Xhorhouse, Fjord immediately poses the question that’s on everyone’s mind. “Well, now what?” For once in their short career, The Mighty Nein resist the urge to immediately jump into action. Instead, Jester takes some time to fuss over Lexia and Caleb, insisting that she use Cure Wounds to heal any cuts or abrasions from the guards’ less than hospitable treatment.

He resists her eager touch. “Nein, nein, Jester I am fine do not waste your spell.”

She rolls her eyes at him and no matter how serious the circumstance, Caleb can’t help but smile whenever she’s annoyed at him.“Caaaayleb it’s not a waste.Those guards were the WORST and besides I have like all my magic right now and I probably won’t need it for the rest of today.” He shrugs and lets her continue healing.

Beau pokes her head into the kitchen where Jester had set up a makeshift first-aid station. “Wait, aren’t we going to do something? We’re not seriously going to waste an entire day?”

Jester winces responding hesitantly. “Well technically it’s only half a day and besides I think Caleb and Lexy need to rest and…”

Beau doesn’t let her finish. “We don’t have time for rest! We have six days left so what we need to do is start figuring things out, there has to be some angle we can start working from.Some way to pin Trent and the Cerberus Assembly without everything blowing up in our faces.”

Beau starts pulling out her stash of notebooks and spreading them across the kitchen table while Jester finishes tending to the mages. Caleb is still resisting Jester’s renewed attempts to bandage any remaining scrapes, when she looks up to see Beau flipping through pages, frantically muttering to herself in several different languages. “Ooh Beau you look so academic I think Caleb is rubbing off on you”. Jester elbows Caleb gently, coaxing out another smile even as Beau glances up scowling.

She half growls. “Shut up Jess I’m trying to concentrate there has to be a connection here somewhere…”

Eventually, Jester releases her patients and Lexia immediately slinks off to scribble in her spellbook and Caleb takes his leave to continue working on a painstaking notation project he recently undertook on Yussa’s behalf.Another hour goes by before Beau’s sudden yelp of familiar triumph draws Caleb from the depths of the reference material he’d been poring over. “I’ve got it or at least something close”. She bursts into the library and dashes toward him with all of her notebooks in tow. With unsurprising grace, she plops down in front of the armchair he settled himself in, and starts pulling out loose pages and ordering them while frantically scratching barely legible notes in the margins.His keen eye catches the words _Uthodurn_ and _white haired chick_ before Beau finally starts to explain her discovery.“Okay so you remember when we were up north and Reani took us to that curio shop and we bought all of those green crystals the uh…” She skims through her notes “Reisduum!”

Her enthusiasm is somewhat tempered by Caleb’s brisk response.“Ja.”

She groans and punches him in the shoulder. “C’mon man work with me here!”

“Ja, I remember that.” He rubs his shoulder muttering dramatically “What more do you want from me Beauregard?”

She tucks a few papers into her belt and shuffles the rest into a slightly neater pile. “Well didn’t you say those were the same crystals Ikithon used to experiment on the Scourgers?”

“Ja, they are one and the same.” He replies impassively. “What is your point?”

“The point is, that residuum is super rare and it only comes from one place”. She points to a circled section of her notes excitedly. “Whitestone.Which means either Whitestone knows what he’s doing with their residuum and they're assholes or they are completely in the dark…and if they _are_ in the dark and they aren't assholes then I bet they won’t be too excited to hear that their precious resource is being used to experiment on and torture kids.” She winces a little, instantly regretting her bluntness.

Caleb doesn’t even blink, after a moment though he sighs and smiles sadly at her. “If we had even one shred of evidence that might work, but unfortunately we don’t.It would be my word against his. And we both know who they would believe.”

Lexia pipes up, “That’s not entirely true.” Caleb and Beau both swivel almost simultaneously to look at Lexia, nestled in a corner surrounded by ink-stained parchment.She is peering over her spellbook looking at them sheepishly.

Beau frowns walking over. “What do you mean?”

She doesn’t answer right away, she hesitates and takes her time sorting through her own notes. Once everything is order and her hands have stopped shaking she forms a response. “It wouldn’t just be Caleb’s word against Ikithon's it would be mine too.”

This implication of her statement washes over them slowly. Beau crouches down until they’re eye-level with each other. She waits for Lexia to look up before asking, “He used residuum on you too?” She nods without breaking eye-contact.Beau grimaces and then gestures to Caleb. “There you go, evidence.”

He shakes his head, “That’s not really evidence its testimony which might help but its not enough.”

“Its better than nothing, we have to try something.”

“If we try to go up against the Assembly unprepared we will be lucky if any of us make it out alive. They are not to be trifled with.”

“DeRogna wasn’t all that…”

“Beauregard” His tone takes on a warning edge.

“What? Are we just supposed to sit around and do nothing? I don’t see you coming up with any better ideas!”

While they are arguing Lexia is fighting her own internal battle. After the events of the day her secrets weigh much more heavily on her and finally she decides that now is a good time to start being a bit more forthcoming. She takes a deep breath and trains her gaze on a specific spot in front of the fireplace where the carpet is slightly darker; a stain or maybe a scorch mark. With her eyes averted, she begins slowly unwrapping the bandages around her forearms.When the last bandages fall away she clears her throat loudly to get Beau and Caleb’s attention. They both look over and she doesn’t wait for their reaction.

“I have evidence. "She holds out both arms revealing that they are each studded with a mosaic of residuum and outlined with a familiar maze of black tattoos. "Is this enough?"

Beau inhales sharply, Caleb just sighs.“Ja, that should be enough.”


	13. Making a Call

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Mighty Nein call in a favor from a far-off ally.

Silently Caleb, Beau,and Lexia all arrive at the same conclusion. And almost simultaneously they gather themselves and head back into the living room where the rest of the Nein are sprawled out.Caleb clears his throat and waits to garner the room’s full attention. Once all eyes are on him he glances over at Lexia waiting for her approval before he divulges her secrets.She nods, but self-consciously tugs her sleeves further down over her recently exposed arms.Jester immediately notices her discomfort and shuffles over reaching out a reassuring hand, but Lexia shrinks away. She sinks down between two of the couches and stares ahead at nothingness.Caleb hesitates before kneeling beside her and muttering in Zemnian, “I will not say a word if you do not want me to.”

Lexia pulls her knees up under her chin, curling herself into a ball, whispering her response, “You have to, we don’t have a choice.”

“Lexia.” He patiently waits until her eyes flicker up towards him. “I promise, you have a choice. If you do not want me to tell them, then we will find another way.”

Her gaze locks onto his, she looks around at everyone looking at her. Not staring, just looking on with genuine concern. She switches back to common, “Please, tell them. This is the way I want to try and fix things, we can’t lose this chance to stop the Assembly.”

He stands up, “Ja, I agree. Ahem, ah Beauregard why don’t you explain your discoveries and I will fill in details as needed. Agreed?”

She shrugs, “Sure man. Alright, so basically…”

Lexia feels herself floating away, Beau’s words are washing over her meaninglessly.Jester sits near her and Lexia knows she’s there and why she’s there, but she can’t bring herself to acknowledge her. She can't smile at her, or offer a friendly whisper like she usually does when she’s not lost inside herself. The word _Residuum_ cuts through the haze and the voice shifts from female to male and knowing what’s coming she deliberately buries herself deeper and tries to drown out his voice with memorized arcane words strung together and restrung in a thousand intricate patterns.Making meaning out of chaos, and meaning into chaos until…she feels a strong gentle hand rest reassuringly on her shoulder. A blue calloused thumb is rubbing back and forth against the soft cloth covering her shoulder. The sensation grounds her and she breaks the surface.The room has descended into temporary silence.With Jester’s help she stands up and makes her way shakily over to Caleb who looks almost as sick as she feels. She smiles at him and he smiles weakly back. 

Fjord’s voice finally cuts through the silence, “Well, I guess that means we’re going to Whitestone.” He stands up leaning against the doorframe rubbing the back of his neck and smiling tiredly at Caleb, Beau, and Lexia.Jester sidles up to him, “Sooo if we’re going to Whitestone does that mean I should try to contact Allura?”

Fjord grimaces, but before he can respond Yasha pipes up softly. “Who is Allura?”

Jester gasps, “Oh my gosh that’s right you never really got a chance to meet her properly because you were umm…not with us but she’s the one who helped us get you back! Ooh I know I’m gonna message her right now, I bet she’ll totally want to help us again!

“Ah Jester…” “Hang on Jessie…” “Wait I think last time she said she was busy…” Their protests fall on deaf ear as they ears as she draws out the somatic and the familiar cheery cadence of Jester's voice rings out, “Hey Allura it’s Jester I was just wondering if you know anything about this place called Whitestone I think its in Tal’Dorei that’s where you…” Jester frowns whe she feels the magic cut her off.She starts to send another message when a response comes through.

“ _Jester, yes I am quite familiar with Whitestone, is your group looking to make a trip?”_

Jester relays the message before sending a follow-up. “Yes! We have some questions for whoever is in charge of the Whitestone Residuum supply. Sooo can you take us or can you give…” Once again her words are cut off and she blows out all her breath in frustration. Allura answers, demonstrating more patience with Jester’s style of messaging than most. “I could meet you at Yussa’s to further discuss your intentions. Whitestone is a protected city they do not take kindly to strangers.”

“Okay so Allura said she could meet us at Yussa’s tower like…I mean basically now? But she hasn’t decided if she’ll help us get to Whitestone, she said they really don’t like strangers there and I’m not sure if she completely trusts us…”

Caduceus shrugs, “I mean that seems fair we don’t always give off the most trustworthy vibe.”

Veth agrees emphatically, “Yeah, plus I’m pretty sure our housekeeper thinks we’re smugglers or work for the mob or something.”

Fjord facepalms mumbling into his hand, “We do work for the mob.” Veth and Fjord argue whether they technically still work for the Myriad and Jester contributes insisting that it doesn’t count since the mob boss is her dad.Meanwhile, Caleb starts drawing out a teleportation circle in the middle of the living room, and by the time he’s done the argument has died down.

“Are we ready?” His hand is poised to draw the final line. Beau does a quick headcount and nods.“Wait a moment, aren’t we going to talk about…” Fjord’s protest is abruptly cut off by a rush of magical energy. Lexia blinks and the Xhorhaus is gone. She and the rest of the Mighty Nein are standing inside an ornate teleportation room that she can only assume belongs to Yussa.

“Oh shit.” Jester winces and Lexia turns toward her. “What? What’s wrong?”

“I forgot to send a message to Yussa letting him know we were coming…Hey Yussa so we’re coming to see you and so is Allura in fact we’ll probably be here I mean there by the time you…” Jester shrugs as the message Peters out and Fjord sighs, "Well it's probably better than nothing."

A few seconds go by before they hear the pitter patter of small flat feet echoing from the spiral staircase above them.Jester greets the small green man that follows the footfalls with genuine enthusiasm. “Wensforth! Hi, it’s us again, don't worry you don’t have to get Yussa, Allura is meeting us her, but I promise we’re totally not going to bother you like at all.”

Wensforth nods slowly in acknowledgement, “Oh, umm great? Alright well I’ll just let Master Yussa know that you’re here but you don’t need anything? Is that right?”

Jester looks around and shrugs, “Yeah no, we’re good.” The rest of the party makes various noises of assent. Wensforth makes a silent exit and the heavy wooden door has hardly closed behind him when there’s a soft whisper of magic. The teleportation circle glows andAllura arrives gracefully, looking around and quickly taking stock of her surroundings. “I see you have a new member among you.” All eyes turn toward Lexia who blushes and stumbles forward wide-eyed staring at the tall, fair woman, blonde hair subtly twined with gray, clear blue eyes, and residual magic gently drifting off her fingertips. 

“M-My name is Lexia, they mentioned someone named Allura, but I had no idea they meant Arcanist Vysoren I wanted…I mean I heard stories and read accounts about all you’ve accomplished in Tal’Dorei and during the attacks of the Chroma Conclave you…you’re incredible and before I was pushed in another direction at the academy all I wanted was to be an Abjuration Arcanist like you I dreamt of studying as your apprentice and you’re just here…and…and.” She looks around red-faced, suddenly realizing how long she’s been rambling. Beau is smirking and Jester is nodding gentle encouragement.“I’m so sorry I- that isn’t why we asked you to come I was just surprised and I’m going to just stop talking now…”

Allura smiles kindly, “What school did you end up studying in?”

Lexia can’t bring herself to look her in the eye, “I-I studied uh at the academy the Soltryce…academy I studied…” Beau interrupts, “Not to interrupt this cute fangirl moment but we’re still on a serious time crunch.”

Lexia shakes her head hugging herself and trying to refocus. “Right, we really need to get to Whitestone because people in Rexxentruum have been misusing their residuum, they’re using it to…to…”. She can’t bring herself to say it, she reflexively digs her nails into her upper arms and glances desperately toward Caleb and Beau.

Caleb continues for her. “Allura, the Cerberus Assembly has been abusing Whitestone’s resources for many years, it is our sincere hope to expose them and remove them from their suffocating position of power in the Empire.”

She sits down hard on an armchair propped against the wall, “I see, I believe you, you’ve given me no reason to question your integrity however, something isn’t right. The current rulers of Whitestone have no connections with the Cerberus Assembly and they don’t supply residuum to anyone and more than that according to records the only residuum supply from previous usurpers would have dried up years ago, the De Rolos refused to create any more because it is so dangerous and powerful if what you say is true than there is still corruption lying dormant in Whitestone.”

Caleb takes in the information with careful consideration, “Then it is feeding the powers that be in the Empire and it must be stopped.”

“That settles it.” She beckons and they follow her out of the Tower where she immediately kneels down and draws out the symbols for an unfamilar teleportation circle. “I’ll hear the rest of your story after we’ve arrived in Whitestone.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like to apologize for abusing ellipses its a habit I've refused to break. Also you should know that Lexia's reaction is only a fraction of what I felt when Allura showed up in C2 I nearly screamed myself hoarse for my favorite wizard mom <3


	14. To Whitestone!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Mighty Nein reflect on what awaits them and encounter some friendly faces in Whitestone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gonna be honest this chapter is 60% fan service but I'm having a good time and I hope you are too!

In a flash they’re no longer in Nicodranas. Lexia looks up and feels a snowflake land on her cheek. She looks around shivering in a snow-covered cityscape.Her breath freezes as she whispers, “Whitestone.”

For her part, Allura looks fully at home, she pulls her cloak tighter around her, acknowledging the cold, but her gaze is fixed on a castle in the distance. “Make haste Mighty Nein, it might take a moment or so to convince the Lord and Lady De Rolo to hear you out. Of course my presence and good will toward you will carry weight, but still I’m afraid they’ve been preoccupied as of late…” She trails off, lost in thought for a moment before continuing. “I’ll send a message ahead of us to announce our arrival.” She pauses for a moment in complete silence. Everyone stares at her until Veth blurts out, “Wait, you don’t have to use sending out loud?!” “SHH.”

Allura glances over at Veth, but finishes concentrating on the spell. “They’ll be expecting us now.”

With those words, the full weight of their circumstances start to settle over the Nein.

Caleb begins fanning through their options, debating how much to tell and how much to hold back? What will serve their cause and what might undermine them and more urgently, how much will Lexia be willing to share and will it be enough to convince the Lord and Lady of Whitestone to help them?

Beau instinctively moves closer to Yasha seeking warmth. Yasha wraps an arm around her and lets Beau snuggle into her furs. Her thoughts wander away from the woman beside her to the challenges facing them ahead. How much weight can the Cobalt Soul throw around here? Aside from testimonies how are they going to prove the direct Residuum connection between Whitestone and the Cerberus Assembly? Will they be able to draw the connections and put a plan into action in less than a week? In her experience bureaucracy doesn’t work that way, but Allura seems to trust these De Rolo guys which is at least one point in their favor…

Jester is working overtime to rein in her endless curiosity. She has dozens of questions for Allura, but she knows its more important to stay focused on what happens next. This whole next week is going to be a careful tightrope walk of putting one foot in front of the other without looking down. Because looking down means they lose Lexia or they lose everything else and neither are options in her book. Deep breath, first step is to make some new friends and hope they’re ready and willing to fight some evil wizards!

Caduceus is honestly pretty disoriented by all of this.He’s never mentioned it before, but he really hates teleporting, it makes him sick and gives him no time at all to readjust to a new landscape. All the new sights, sounds, and smells are overwhelming. And doing it twice in one day is really too much. He finds himself struggling to keep up with all the plans and the plots that seem to be constantly changing. All of his friends are being a little too cryptic and he knows that keeping secrets from each other can only end in disaster.

Veth is completely onboard with Mission: Destroy the Wizards Who Hurt My Kids and Husband! A rage like she hasn’t felt since she was goblin is burning in her stomach.Regardless of how involved they were, in her mind, every member of the Cerberus Assembly is equally guilty because they knew exactly what Ikithon was doing to kids like Caleb and Lexia and they just stood back and let him do it.So now, they all have to die. It’s really not that complicated and these De Rolos are gonna help them or else.

Fjord has been feeling strangely disconnected from this whole situation. Everything has been moving so fast and he cares, he really does care, but seven days doesn’t feel like enough time to take down a council of magic users who have made themselves invaluable to King Dwendal and fully integral to the Empire. Tactically, its completely ridiculous, but the reality is that they have to try something, and fast. And if that means they have to come up with another dumb, death-defying plan then he’s willing to follow them all to hell and back. Still, he has to wonder if the churning dread that’s been haunting him is a warning sign from the Wildmother or his own residual cowardice rearing its ugly head once again.

Yasha is still working to control her rage, yet lately she’s been having an especially hard time. Lexia hasn’t spoken freely but Yasha is perceptive enough to see all the familiar signs of abuse and manipulation. She’s not sure, but instinctively she blames Ikithon for Lexia’s mistreatment. Before Obann came back for her she had wanted to kill Ikithon because of how he treated Caleb. She could see how much pain his mind and memories caused him. She understood that pain and imagined it was worse coming from someone who claimed the title of teacher and master. But, ever since she came back to the Nein everytime someone has mentioned Ikithon she feels her blood boil, but her traitorous mind refuses to picture the jaundiced wizard lying through his eyes and flattering meaninglessly through his rotting teeth instead the name _Ikithon_ somehow triggers an image of a red fiend holding a barbarian woman on a chain leash, like a dog, manipulating and unleashing her rage on hundreds of innocent people…In her mind Ikithon and Obann are the same, two abusers who have left them with bloody hands and broken minds. To Yasha, the Cerberus Assembly is just an obstacle that stands in the way of killing Ikithon and finally destroying hers, Caleb’s, and Lexia’s demons. 

Lexia on the other hand is taking everything in at once and trying desperately to push down the nausea accompanying the bombardment of fears and emotions she’s navigating. Every step marks renewed effort to try to ignore the pounding mantra in her head _whatdoisaywhatdoisaywhatdoisaywhatdoisay…how do I fix this?_

Almost without warning they’re all jarred out of their circling thoughts when a dark-skinned guard with a wide handsome smile calls down from a watchtower outside the castle gates. “Well, if isn’t the Lady Allura, how are you and who are your friends?”

“Hello Jarett, l am doing quite well. Allow me to introduce my companions, these formidable adventurers are known as the Mighty Nein they hail from Wildemount.

Jarett raises his arm in greeting to the mismatched bunch of adventurers trailing behind Allura. “Greetings Mighty Nein, I am Jarett Howarth Captain of the Pale Guard I welcome you to Whitestone.” He gives a slight bow. “It has been some time since adventurers aside from Vox Machina have passed through here.” They return the gesture and he signals the other watchmen to begin raising the gate.“And it seems even longer since you’ve graced our city with your presence my lady. I must ask, are Percy and Vex expecting you or is this a surprise?”

“They should be expecting us and I should add that we are here on urgent business.”

He whispers to an older looking guard who immediately retreats into the castle, “Say no more, Kynan get down there!”

A youngish man, close to Caleb’s age makes his way down from the watchtower. Allura smiles when she sees him and he smiles back with friendly recognition before assuming a stern military persona that clashes terribly with his still boyish features and soft demeanor. “Hail, I am Kynan Lenore Leader of the Whitestone Riflemen I will be escorting you to meet the Lord and Lady De Rolo. They will be expecting you in the drawing room.”

Allura bows her head in respectiful acknowledgement. “Thank you Kynan. Do you know if Lady Cassandra will be there as well? I believe she will want to be present for this meeting.”

He frowns, “I don’t believe she had planned to make an appearance, but I’ll make sure she is sent for as well.” He beckons a guard who takes a hastily written note and departs in the opposite direction. 

As they walk, they all take in the sights of the castle. All heads are on full swivel as they make their way through the halls passively observing the various painting and statuary tastefully scattered about the castle.Kynan notices their interest and points out a few pieces with more history behind them. “That, is a portrait of the previous generation of the De Rolo family and that there is a statue that was commissioned to celebrate the liberation of Whitestone.”

Caleb cocks his head curiously inquiring softly. “Liberation? From what?”

Kynan’s eyes darken ever so slightly,“ It’s not a pleasant story, but if you have the time, I’m sure the Lord De Rolo will be happy to give you a history lesson.”

“Indeed, it’s getting him to stop talking, that is the real issue”. A new feminine voice startles them from behind.A woman, with a young face, but silvered hair streaked with black approaches them from behind.Kynan immediately stands at attention, but the woman ignores him and greets Allura with an affectionate kiss on both cheeks. “Allura, I was told you sent for me?”

Allura returns the greeting with warmth.The corners of her eyes crinkle betraying age and genuine fondness for the young woman. “I did, thank you for coming. You look well Cassandra, diplomacy suits you.”

The compliment is graciously accepted, after the initial greeting, the woman becomes a model of decorum. “Ah yes, thank you.”

“Along with other things” Allura’s eyes wander towards Kynan who is still standing stiffly upright, but his eyes are slanted downward and his cheeks are unnaturally red.Cassandra looks appropriately dismissive of Allura’s implication but she doesn’t quite manage to hide the sly smile and light flush in her cheeks.

“Well shall we?” She gestures toward the large double doors standing befor them that presumably lead into the drawing room. Cassandra does not even blink at Allura’s company her brother has had far stranger guests, at this point nothing surprises her anymore.She imperiously throws open the doors and before Kynan can officially announce their presence she exclaims. “Well, brother it’s been a while since Whitestone has gotten mixed up with adventurers of this sort…” She looks the mismatched group up and down critically before turning back towards the human man with pure white hair and a serious expression seated next to a dark-haired half-elven woman.“Oh Percy what have you done now?”


	15. A Painful Story

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexia provides new information regarding her training and the assembly's continuing residuum experiments.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm late, but I'm back! Enjoy this extra long chapter to make up for the hiatus. Also TW for fairly graphic descriptions of medical/magical experimentation and body horror aka some sweet sweet residuum nonsense

He looks up from a sheath of paperwork smiling wryly at Cassandra. “Cass, lovely to see you as well.Before you say anything else I’d just like to preface this conversation by saying that _I_ have not done anything.” 

Beau mutters under her breath “That we know of.”

The half-elf woman’s eyes narrow at Beau.“Pardon me, I don’t believe we’ve met. I usually like to acquaint myself with guests before they begin insulting my husband.”She stands up glaring at Beau who looks annoyed but at least semi-remorseful. “Yeah, my bad, really didn’t think you’d hear that, honestly? We just haven’t decided how much we trust you it’s nothing personal.”

Allura is already kneading her forehead in abject frustration.They've only been here five seconds and already the conversation has taken a turn for the worse.Vex snipes back at Beau, “I don’t think it's wise to begin these talks by questioning our integrity. Haven’t you come here for aid?” One perfectly manicured eyebrow is raised and her voice is tinged with sarcasm. 

Thankfully before things can get any more heated Allura intervenes. “Vex’ahlia, in spite of first impressions.” She looks pointedly at Beau who has the decency to look sheepish. “I will vouch for them and their intentions.”

Vex’ahlia releases Beau from her gaze sighing before smiling tiredly at Allura. “It is good to see you Allura, I apologize if I seem a bit on edge, between the twins and Whitestone’s recent…” She pauses looking at the strangers crowded in the room before choosing her words carefully “Financial disruptions. I’ve been run a bit ragged as of late.” Percy looks up frowning. “I only just returned from a business trip to Kraghammer. I got back and found Vex working herself to the bone and yet somehow everything was still running even better than before.” He kisses her on the forehead and she rolls her eyes before catching his lips in a full kiss.

Cassandra interrupts clearing her throat loudly. “I understand that you two have missed each other terribly, but now is certainly not the time for you to be catching up. I believe these adventurers have brought us news?” She poses the question in the Mighty Nein’s general direction, but she makes deliberate eye contact with Caleb.

He looks to Allura for assurance before plunging ahead. “Ja, we are the Mighty Nein from the Wildemount and we have come because my home nation, the Dwendalian Empire has been corrupted by the influence of…one of your resources.”

Percy’s interest is instantly piqued. “Resources? Are you referring to whitestone itself, the mineral?”

Caleb starts to nod but hesitates. “Well n-not exactly, from what I understand the resource is made from whitestone, but well, it…it has come to our attention through various channels of knowledge that a substance known only as residuum has been a source of growing corruption in the Empire, especially in Rexxentrum.”

Percy’s expression goes from serious, to stern, to concerned and settles on black anger.He pushes aside the papers and drops the put-on formalities. “What has been done with our residuum?” His tone drops dangerously and even Vex leans foward wiht obvious concern.Looking around the room Cassandra has gone white and Kynan has taken his leave quietly the only indication being the door creaking slightly at his exit. Caleb breathes heavily and struggles to begin their tale.The room is eerily silent as all the adventurers young and old wait patiently for his response. 

All at once Lexia makes a decision and blurts out, “I’ll tell you!” The entire room turns to look at her. She takes a shaky breath and says in a much quieter voice. “I-I know what’s being done with the residuum.”

Percy sees the girl stepping out from the circle of strangers. Both of her bandaged hands are clenched into fists, she is shaking and seems like she’s on the verge of tears. _A child._ He looks her over and determines that she can’t too much older than sixteen. He takes note of the high-pitched girlish voice choked by a restrained sob. But, it’s her eyes that catch him by surprise. They hold such a look of determination in them that he can’t help being impressed. “Alright, we’ll hear your story but, first…” He walks over to briefly poke his head out of the double doors. He answers Cassandra’s silent query saying. “…This seems like a conversation that will require drinks.”

Vex nods her agreement “Also, there’s no need to keep our guests standing around. Please have a seat, make yourselves comfortable.” She gestures toward a circle of armchairs and couches. “And a llow me to make some formal introductions. I am Lady Vex’ahila De Rolo. This…” She gently nudges the whitehaired man. “Is Lord Percival Frederickstein Von Mussel Kossolwski De Rolo III and his sister” she nods toward the silver and dark haired woman “Lady Cassandra De Rolo”. The Mighty Nein respond with the appropriate introductions. By the time most of them are settled, a servant arrives with several bottles of wine and liquor.

Lexia holds out her glass toward the bottle of white wine, but Percy waves it away from her before it can be filled. “I need you sober and besides you are a child, I consider myself a fairly responsible man and I don’t give alcohol to my children.” 

Lexia bristles visibly. “I am not a child.” She draws herself up to her full five feet and resists the urge to glare at the ruler of Whitestone. Unlike the rest of the Nein she hasn’t found a place to sit down, she feels more grounded standing. Without offering a retort, she clasps her hands behind her back and mentally prepares herself, ordering the story chronologically in her mind.

However, the familiar posture sparks something inside Caleb. “Ah, before we begin, it’s important that you know _my_ personal experience with residuum was ah unpleasant to say the least, but I was compliant.” He hushes Beau and Veth’s protests. “I was willing, she was not.”

All eyes once again turn toward Lexia. Percy nods curtly.“Understood.” He looks at Lexia and then glances down at the paper and inkwell laid out on his desk. He dips his fountain pen and immediately begins scratching away on the parchment. “You may begin as soon as you are ready.”

She twists her fingers behind her back nervously, breaking away from the room’s gaze. “First, I think I should provide some context.” She glances up at Caleb who nods his encouragement. “I-I was removed from the Soltryce Academy after a year of study, and Master Trent Ikithon took it upon himself to continue my…training. For months I was trained and eventually used to root out criminals and suspected traitors to the Empire. I had a unique affinity and understanding of magic, that’s the reason I was accepted into the Soltryce in the first place. I-I can elaborate on that later, but it’s not directly connected to the residuum, not that I’m trying to hide anything from you! I just…” She trails off hesitantly.

Vex interjects gently, “It’s alright darling, we’ll worry about that later. Take your time, we’re listening.”

She swallows hard and continues with her eyes still trained on the intricate carpet at her feet. “He, Ikithon, began lending my skills to various magical allies, but eventually their mistreatment was too much and I-I ended up killing a member of the Cerberus Assembly.” Even the Mighty Nein look wide-eyed at that revelation. “He was replaced by current member, Headmaster Oremid Hass. Needless to say my punishment was severe and intended to secure my obedience. It worked for awhile, but the mistreatment continued and so I stopped complying entirely. At that point, I was deemed useless as a soldier, and a spy, but Master Ikithon thought I might still be useful as a test subject. Years ago he began residuum experiments.” She glances up at Caleb for a split second. “Small incisions and carefully placed shards. The intention was to increase magical retention and have the residuum act as a bio-arcane enhancement. As Mr. Widogast can attest the experiments were marginally successful, but the Assembly has continued to express their desire to test the full potential of residuum more thoroughly. So, naturally Ikithon was asked to continue his process. In accordance with the Assembly's wishes he conducted about three months worth of experiments. He started with the control test, repeating the experiment that was previously successful, but he kept pushing further…”

Without looking up and with hardly a breath between words Lexia recounts each experiment describing them with a distinct objectivity that Percy immediately recognizes as a form of deliberate disassociation. The rapt audience is overtaken by a mixture of disgust and righteous anger, but Lexia doesn’t pause long enough to notice. “The last one was supposed to be the most potent, but it was also the most complex ( _painful)_. He spent two weeks pumping out pints of blood ( _my blood)_ and reopening shallow wounds in the forearm that were prepped multiple times a day with powdered residuum until the cuts hardened and cracked when they were reopened ( _it pulled at my skin every time and it felt like bone shards trapped in my veins)_ the final two weeks were spent mixing residuum powder with the extracted blood, and then superheating it so that the residuum was liquefied and thin enough to gradually inject it back into the body ( _my body)_.” Jester gasps and there are few hushed whispers which she fully ignores. “Th-That was the last experiment before I escaped and then I was rescued by the Mighty Nein. That’s all.” She wraps up the story quickly, breathing hard, and still pointedly avoiding any and all eye contact. She wants to move, to sit down, to never be seen again, but she’s frozen stiff, standing, and shaking in front of everyone.

A long minute goes by, before she hears soft footsteps approaching her and gentle arms wrap around her, bringing her back to herself, this room, this moment. Reality. She grabs on to Jester’s arms like they are the only things left in the world to hold onto.Something wet drips down her shirt and she realizes Jester is crying. Carefully, oh so slowly, she looks up to see the Mighty Nein looking positively murderous and Allura along with the rulers of Whitestone all pale-faced and horrified. “I-I that’s all I know, I-I just want the Assembly to stop and I need to keep my _party? friends? family? c_ ompanions safe. The Assembly is threatening them and using me as leverage. If you can, I’m begging you please help us?” She shuts her eyes and leans into Jester, she can’t bring herself to return the embrace but just her proximity is comforting. Heavyfootfalls approach them both, accompanied by a pair of shiny, well-worn boots.

Percy addresses her gently. “Lexia, may I speak with you privately?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!


	16. Promised Allies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexia asks for allies not sanctuary, Percy knows a few heroes who might be interested in coming out of retirement for a special cause.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this is a day later than I promised, and its a little bit more filler than I'd like, but hopefully you still enjoy it!

“ _Lexia, may I speak with you privately?” Oh gods he doesn’t believe me._

Immediately she feels her heart start beating even more frantically. She nods numbly and starts to follow him out of the drawing room. He pauses to swipe an additional glass of white wine before holding the door open for her. She bows her head to acknowledge the courtesy, but she can’t stop herself from sneaking a look over her shoulder at the Mighty Nein who are still seated around the fireplace. They all look stricken, and too distracted to notice her final glance before Lord De Rolo ceremoniously whisks her away.

Halfway down the hall he hands her the additional glass of wine. Her pride nearly prevents her from accepting it, but the promise of the wine’s natural warmth assuages any protests she might have had. Her hands are still shaking and she resists the urge to drain the glass in an attempt to steady herself. She takes a large gulp before attempting an explanation.“L-Lord De Rolo, I-I’ll swear on anything you want me to that everything I said is true, I know it sounds incredible, but please…”

He holds up a hand to stop her and she immediately clamps her mouth shut. “Lexia. Enough apologizing, I believe you. Every word, and before you say anything else, allow me to say that I was wrong and I offer my most sincere apologies.”

 _What?_ She’s taken aback and the apology draws her from her circling thoughts long enough to look up and contemplate the elegant waistcoated back of Lord De Rolo strolling in front of her. “P-Pardon, I-I don’t understand?”

Percy hums to himself thoughtfully, but continues to lead her through the winding halls. “You see, I don’t often admit it, but when I am wrong I do my best to acknowledge it and I was wrong to call you a child.” He stops suddenly and she nearly bumps into him.You’ve clearly been through far too much to even pretend that’s true.”

Lexia isn’t sure how to respond. Their earlier exchange seems so petty and light compared to everything that’s been said since. “I-I thank you for your acknowledgement my lord?” His title comes out sounding like a question.

Percy laughs, a sad strained sound. “No, my dear. No thanks necessary. I only have the slightest idea what you’ve been through. I've had my own run-in with ah medical experimentation if you will; it’s quite honestly some of the nastiest business. It put me in the way to hate magic and medicine for quite some time, as well as making deals for revenge and all sorts of dark dealings that I’ve lived to regret.”

Lexia shivers involuntarily and she could almost swear that a shadow briefly passes over the hall. He turns back to look at her, smiling wryly, “Evidently, you’ve got a much cooler head on your shoulders.”

She almost laughs, “I wouldn’t say that my lord. Afterall, I’m not sure what would be considered more rash than killing a member of the highest ranking magic council in your home country.”

He makes a slight turn down a side hall that leads into a open-air walkway. “Well, I’d say making a deal with a demon is a bit more rash, although it's probably a close tie between us.” Percy's response is disarmingly nonchalant. His face is still impassive, but his eyes betray the joke. 

This time she laughs freely, grateful for the dry, dark wit breaking up her own state of uncertainty and confusion. “A terrible competition to be sure, but aside from our newfound rivalry, why did you wish to speak with me privately?”

Percy nods, “Ah yes, I appreciate you getting straight to the heart of things, quite refreshing. First, I’ll reiterate that I firmly believe your story, and having established that my question to you is, how can the royal family of Whitestone best serve you Miss Lexia?”

He bows grandly and she splutters unintelligibly. “I-I um did you say serve? I only need…I mean we need…what we need is uh…a uh…”

He chuckles and leans leisurely against the walkway railing, brushing away some of the newly fallen snow.“Just breathe, take your time. You said that you and yours had been threatened? I would like to offer Whitestone as a place of sanctuary. We have no diplomatic ties with the Dynasty and very few with the Empire, it would be my distinct pleasure to offer our protection to you and the Mighty Nein.”

This time he merely inclines his head, and she’s recovered enough to bob into a clumsy curtsy. “I-I thank you for your offer, but I cannot accept. Fleeing to Whitestone would leave allies behind in Wildemount, they would be in great danger, not to mention protection only goes so far my lord." This time the title is used with far more confidence. "Bounty hunters and assassins are not uncommon in these situations, and I would hate to burden Whitestone…”

Both of his grey streaked eyebrows fly up at the mention of assassins. “You really must have caused quite a stir. Are you quite sure both nations would go to such lengths?”

She thinks for a moment before responding. “For the Empire it's a point of pride, for the Assembly its efficiency, for the Dynasty it's an issue of peace, and for the Bright Queen it's an assertion of power. I just happen to be caught in the middle of it all and unfortunately no one seems willing to back down. But I won't let anyone else get caught up in this mess with me. Not the Mighty Nein, not their allies, and certainly not Whitestone.”

He lets the silence between them linger before repeating his question. “Then how do you propose we can assist you? If you're not seeking protection, then why come for aid?”

Lexia joins him at the railing looking out over the sprawling grounds that surround Whitestone castle. “My request requires more from you than a place to hide. It’s a foolish proposal, but the only hope we have is that you will become our ally and help us build a case against the Cerberus Assembly." Once she says it out loud the words come spilling out with unmatched fervor. "Corroborate our evidence with your records, and give weight to our words. I know this is a difficult favor to ask, because anyone who stands against the Cerberus Assembly must be prepared for war. Political, magical, and even physical battlelines might be drawn. The Assembly thrives on dissent and violence no matter what they say I know they do not aim for peace.I a m only a means to their ends, but I beg you to join us, so that even if sacrifices must be made, ultimately the Assembly’s corruption of the Empire will end and their goals will not be our ruin.” She’s trembling again, and a bit breathless but her brown eyes are fearlessly locked onto his piercing blue ones.

He traces a finger through the snow thoughtfully. “When you say sacrifices…” Her eye speak volumes.

_You_ _know what I mean._

He doesn’t bother finishing the question, he’s certain he won’t get a real answer from her and it’s easy enough to read between the lines. “What you are asking…I'm afraid that Whitestone is too fragile to go to war.” Her face immediately falls, she catches herself, but it’s too late to hide her obvious disappointment.

He continues before she has a chance to respond.“However, that’s not to say that I am unwilling to help, Whitestone has many powerful allies who dwarf the power of our city and I believe that with very little persuasion I can secure several warriors to aid you in your mission. Would that suffice?”

Her expression shifts on a dime from disappointment to awe. “I think that should suffice, although I’ll admit I don’t have a lot of experience with warriors. I wouldn’t know what to expect, but I trust your judgment.”

He smirks almost laughing, “Trust me, even if you’d met dozens of warriors, Vox Machina is not at all what you would expect.”

She immediately perks up and whips her head toward him with renewed excitement. “Did you say Vox Machina? Weren’t they the ones who fought with Allura against the Cinder King?”

He raises an eyebrow, “Ah so you have heard of us?” She blinks twice and looks at the man in front of her very carefully. “Y-You’re not the gunslinger from Whitestone?”

He chuckles, “Apparently our names don’t travel well with our deeds?”

She shakes her head incredulously, “I’ve only heard stories, and most of them were more like legends, almost unbelievable.”

“That was our specialty.” He looks almost wistful for a moment, “No matter, I am certain that they will gladly assist you, as shall I. Retirement really doesn’t suit us.”

She stands there with her mouth agape, a buzz of excitement masks the growing cold around them. “I-I’m having a difficult time coming up with an appropriate response to that.”

Percy laughs again heartily before extending his hand as a formality. “Will you accept our help?”

This time she takes her time to sink down into a much deeper and more graceful curtsy before graciously accepting his proffered hand. “I would be honored to accept your help.”

He nods and pulls his cloak tighter around himself, finally acknowledging the cold. “Excellent, well then, shall we return to your friends?”

He holds out his arm and she gingerly takes it. “Yes.” Her smiles widens at the thought. “I’m sure that the promise of allies will be welcome news.

They stay mostly silent on their way back to the drawing room. As they approach the double doors, Lexia is surprised not to hear the usual raucous conversation that seems to follow the Mighty Nein wherever they go. There are no sounds coming from the room and when they enter the few hushed voices immediately fall silent.

Percy clears his throat loudly, breaking the unusual silence, “Mighty Nein.” He waits until all eyes in the room are on him. He catches Vex’s glance smiling at her and then at the room,”You should consider yourselves quite lucky, thanks to the incredible persuasive powers of Miss Lexia, you have all just gained at least seven new allies.” He pauses to scan over the room allowing the silence to stand in for the gravity of his words. “Allies with the power and influence necessary to root out the corruption in your homeland.” 

Caleb and Beau stand up to acknowledge the new alliance and Lexia finds herself getting lost in the bustle as they make plans for tomorrow and finally slow down enough to start settling in for the evening. The De Rolos graciously offer the Mighty Nein the finest selection of rooms in the castle, but seeing that Lexia is still fairly shaken (and the rest of them are as well) they decide to take a single room and end up in their signature cuddle pile. Safe and warm for another night. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're getting close to full meetup between the Mighty Nein and Vox Machina! What do you think so far? Feel free to let me know in the comments.


	17. Just a Dream

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexia wakes up in a horrifyingly familiar place

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Abuse, Trauma
> 
> Yeahhh this one is dark and nightmarish soooo...enjoy?

Lexia looks around blinking hard, trying to clear away her unfamiliar surroundings. The cozy room in Whitestone Castle is gone, replaced by a space that is unfamiliar at first, and then all at once too familiar. She sits up and looks around at the damp stone walls lit by flickering candlelight and the ominous chains hanging on the opposite side of the room.She knows this place, but…she escaped? How is she here again?

_Lexia_

She whips her head toward the voice and she sees him standing there a few feet in front of her. Towering over her despite his hunched form. Yellowed eyes, far more sickly in the dim light, but no less cruel and calculating.

**M-Master Ikithon?**

_Oh_ my _dear Lexia you really have made a mess of things._

 **No…please…** ****

_Did you think you were safe?_

**No, I don’t want this!** ****

She screams wordlessly and her voice echoes in the stone chamber as she backs away frantically, nearly tripping over the uneven flagstones until her hands brush against cold metal and she hears the faint rattle of iron scraping against stone.

_Now, now, stop running. Be a good little soldier and accept your punishment._

He advances toward her until she is pressed up against the wall, and she can feel the chains tangling in her hair.

 **I’m not a soldier. I can’t fight. I wasn’t made for that. Please let me go, I don’t want to go back…** ****

Her voice falters as she tries to swallow the rising panic.

A slow sickening smile splits his face like a wound, revealing half-rotten teeth unshielded by their usual glamour. ****

_Hmm so much to say for someone relieved of their tongue. I wonder what else you can live without?_

**Master please…**

_Cast without?_

**No! Get away from me!** ****

He leans in further and she twists away falling to the side, but hardly registering the shock before she scrambles backward, fitting herself into the farthest corner. She hugs her knees to her chest, sobbing and shaking uncontrollably. ****

 _I don’t think a mage of your caliber really needs to be able to_ _see_ _in order to be useful. Muteness didn’t tame you, perhaps blindness will?_

Lexia curls into herself burying her head in her arms, muffling the screaming sobs that are overwhelming the tiny space and ringing in her ears.She can hear his leather boots slowly shuffling across the flagstones towards her. All at once the dread is too much, all the fight goes out of her, her body is rigid with fear and she looks up shouting through blinding tears.

 **No!** ****

**STOP!** ****

**P-Please I-I won’t run away again.** ****

**Just…don’t…** ****

She can feel him breathing against her scalp as jagged nails dig into her temples and magic starts to burrow into her eyes. ****

**I PROMISE I’LL BE GOOD. I can learn to be a good soldier**

She hisses against the building pain. ****

 **I can.** ****

She tries to open her eyes… ****

 **I will.** ****

…but the world is fading fast around her ****

 **Just please** … **make it stop** …

Please. 

Suddenly, the pain is gone. _Lexia?_

The voice isn’t mocking her anymore.

_Lexia wake up._

There is more than one voice. The first one sounds concerned, and neither them sound cruel. She feels a hand on her head, but the touch is soft and the fingers aren’t trying to possess her. Another set of hands are rubbing careful circles into her wrists applying gentle pressure. Someone pulls the blanket aside and sits her up.

 _Lexia are you awake? Lexia, it’s Jester I’ve got you, you’re safe._ ****

**That word again. _Safe_? I hate that word, its such a _lie_.**

Her eyes finally open and she sees a circle of concerned faces crowded around her. Jester is propping her up and Caleb is kneeling beside the blue tiefling.His dancing lights circle lazily above them giving the room a warm glow that is usually friendly, but right now it only reminds her of the dimly lit room in her nightmare.

Nightmare. That’s all it was, just a nightmare, a particularly bad one, but a dream all the same. Except…that it isn’t, not completely. If everything doesn’t go perfectly according to their plan than that dream is going to be her reality again. All the bitterness, all the hardness, she built up to protect herself has started to melt away and she can feel how naked and vulnerable she is without it. How unprepared she is to return to that existence. Before…that was not a life, but these past few months, she has been living. Living fully, with this wonderful chaotic crew who make her feel safe. Who let her be comfortable. They broke down all her defenses and now if she goes back no… _when_ she goes back she won’t have any fight left. All of her strength has been sapped away by kind words, gentle gestures, and simple comforts. When she sees Ikithon again he’s going to break her. And since it’s a question of “when” and not “if” she silently resolves to retrain herself; to take back that strength, and make certain she doesn’t stay a soft, breakable thing. She has to kill this shaking, crying pitiful child easily frightened by a dream that pales in comparison to her past experiences.

She lets Caleb, Jester, and Veth soothe her back to a false sleep. Nodding along with their empty words of safety and assurance.She waits until she can hear seven different steady breathing rhythms before she carefully extricates herself from the cuddle pile and slips out into the cold empty hallway; unlit by moonlight and permeated by silence.

_—————————————————————————-_

A bright jingle rings through Caleb’s head, signalling the breach of his arcane alarm. His eyes snap open just in time to see the bedroom door swing shut. He immediately elbows Beau who wakes up with a start, she reaches out wildly for her staff and accidentally catches her sleeve on one of Jester’s horns. “What’s wrong, what’s happening?” Beau jumps to her feet and immediately starts feeling around for her staff. “Shit it’s dark, Caleb put up some lights and tell us what’s going on?”

He mutters under his breath, she hears him swearing in Zemnian. “She’s gone.”

Jester groans in her sleep before opening one eye wide enough to see that Caleb is frantically fumbling for his coat and books. “Wha-Lexia’s gone?

Caleb tosses the globules up absentmindedly, almost simultaneously snapping Frumpkin into existence before sending him padding down the hall with silent orders. “I don’t think she was well after she woke up earlier…”

Beau relaxes after realizing that there are no enemies to defend against “Yeah, I mean she looked pretty shaken, but she probably needs space shouldn’t we just leave her alone?”

By this time Jester has extricated herself from the pile, “I don’t think she should be alone right now, plus she might get lost in this big castle or hurt herself stumbling around in the dark or some mean guards might think she’s trying to steal something or…

“Alright, alright I get it.” Beau grumbles and then pokes Caleb who has been wringing his hands and switching in and out of Frumpkin vision. “Hey did you find anything yet?”

He returns to his body, “Nein.”

Beau half shrugs, clearly less than thrilled at being woken up twice in one night. “Then she doesn’t want to be found. Let’s just go back to sleep, give her some time to sort things out on her own, and if she’s still missing in the morning then we’ll start worrying.”

He thinks for a moment before shaking his head, “I need to check on her, I’ll be back momentarily no need to wake up the others.” Beau opens her mouth to protests, but he walks out the door before she can say anything else. Jester is nervously shifting from one foot to another, openly telegraphing her uncertaintly and concern.

Veth’s scratchy voice cuts into the conversation, “Who’s missing?”

Beau sighs heavily, still viciously rubbing sleep out of her eyes. “Lexia, but she’s not missing yet, she probably just went out to get some fresh air or…” Beau doesn’t have a chance to finsh her thought, a loud knocking sound drowns her out momentarily followed by the sounds of running feet and loud frantic voices.

She exchanges a quick look with Jester who looks equal parts upset and determined. “Well that doesn’t sound good.” With another loud sigh, she digs her foot into Fjord’s ribs while Jester goes to gently shake Yasha and Caduceus awake. “Hey, rise and shine captain, one of our crewmates are MIA.” He wakes up moaning, “What the? Why? Why would you wake anyone up like that?”

She shrugs, “It worked didn’t it”. He groans in response. It takes less than a minute for them to gather themselves and set out to scour the halls.They’re about halfway down a long vaguely familiar highway when Beau holds out an arm to stop them. She signs for them to be quiet. They all stop and listen. The sounds of voices arguing come from further down the hall and Beau waves them forward cautiously. At the end of the hall they find Caleb arguing in hushed tones with Lord and Lady De Rolo who are both wearing dressing gowns and wielding impressive weapons. Vex has a knuckle white grip on an elaborate long bow and Percy has a sleek pistol held carefully at his hip.

“Please don’t call the Pale Guard, she’s already frightened, that won’t help.”

Percy pinches the bridge of his nose, trying to be the model of patience but still clearly half asleep. “If they find her wandering about she’ll be arrested, no questions asked so at least tell us where she is so we can inform them that she means no harm.”

“If I knew where she was I would tell you, but I’m still trying to find her, I’m sorry that my efforts…” He glances back and sees the rest of the Mighty Nein trailing behind him “Err well, _our_ efforts woke you and caused a panic.”

“It wasn’t your efforts darling, it was that unsettling knocking sound that woke us.”

Percy jumps in without giving Caleb a chance to respond.“And I’m not sure if you know our history, but Whitestone doesn’t take kindly to strangers wandering around at night.” 

Caleb bows, “You have my sincerest apologies, I promise we’ll return to our rooms quietly as soon as we find our companion.”

Percy beckons a guard who had been standing in the shadows practically unseen. “Inform the Pale Guard, If you find a girl in her teens, short dark hair you are to leave her be and report her whereabouts back to me immediately, understood?”

“Yes, my lord.”

“Good.” He turns back toward Caleb and gives a brief nod of general acknowledgement to the rest of the Nein. “Now, do any of you have any idea where she might have gone?” They all look at each other for an answer, and surprisingly Yasha is the one who pipes up first. ‘Well if she wasn’t feeling well, she might have tried to get outside? You know fresh air?”

Percy considers that idea carefully, “Hmm, well then perhaps she tried to find the exposed walkway where we spoke yesterday?”

He looks at Vex who shrugs, “You’re guess is as good as mine darling.”

“Well let’s start there, shall we?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay extra long chapter hope you enjoyed it.

**Author's Note:**

> Sooo hopefully you liked it and if you did please leave a comment letting me know! This is my first long form fic in a LONG while but I have big plans for this thing if all goes well <3


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